


Mommy and Daddy's Love Story

by NotaDroid (mjonhunt)



Series: Mommy and Daddy's Adventures [1]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Family, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-10
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:00:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 29,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25174264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mjonhunt/pseuds/NotaDroid
Summary: Spencer Reid and a pregnant Emily tell their daughters about how they fell in love and started a family. Not related to any of my other fics.
Relationships: Emily Prentiss/Spencer Reid
Series: Mommy and Daddy's Adventures [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1823728
Comments: 11
Kudos: 31





	1. The Gitmo Adventure

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I found this really cool video on Youtube called Reid/Prentiss. What caught my attention were images of two brunette girls and a blonde haired kid. In my mind, these are the Reid-Prentiss kids. That brought to mind a scene where the two girls ask their mother about falling in love with their father.

"Mommy, when did you fall in love with Daddy?"

Samantha Rose Prentiss-Reid looked up at her mother, trying to give her Samantha's best please tell me look. Samantha was in her pajama, under the covers of her bed, not wanting to go to sleep, just yet.

"Yes Mommy, tell us about when you and Daddy fell in love!" Samantha's sister, Diane Elizabeth Prentiss-Reid said. Neither one of them were ready for sleep just yet, and were hoping they could convince their mother to hold off turning out the light for just a few moments longer.

Emily looked at her two beautiful daughters, both of whom had her dark hair, and knew their questions had more to do with not wanting to go to sleep than to know about how she and Spencer first fell in love. However, Emily didn't want to dismiss the question altogether. She didn't want to be one of those parents who answered question by saying, "Not now" or "Because I said so."

"It's a very long story. Much too long to tell you two tonight."

"But Mooooom!" The girls protested in unison.

"However," she said, " I will tell you two about the first time we met. And if you two are good and get ready for bed on time for the next few nights, I'll tell you the whole story. Or we can just turn off the light right now."

"No, No, We'll be good." Samantha said.

"Yes Mom, we promise." Diane said.

Emily smiled. Even though the girls looked more like her than Spencer, she couldn't help but see their father in them when they smiled like this. She settled in the chair between their beds, and when she did so she felt a great relief. She was in her last trimester of pregnancy and standing for any period of time was a test of endurance.

She already knew this one was going to be a boy. She and Spencer had already picked out a name…Matthew Jason. They decided they wanted to name him after two men who had a positive impact on their lives. Emily gently ran her hands over her belly, hoping her touch would give some comfort to her newest baby genius.

"I'll be the first to admit, with me and Daddy, it wasn't love at first sight. The truth is, I barely noticed your father when I came to the BAU. Uncle Aaron was the boss, and I thought Uncle Derek was much more handsome. Of course, I was terribly nervous. I had worked for so long and so hard to get there, and your Uncle Aaron almost sent me packing on my first day. After that though, I really didn't spend much time with your father. Until our first adventure."

Explaining BAU cases to children, Emily had discovered, was a challenge. She had learned from Spencer's experience with his mother it's best to phrase everything in terms of adventures. "We went with Jason Gideon to a far away place called Gitmo." She chose not to over explain things, not about Guantanamo Bay or the politics of it all.

"We had to ask questions of a very bad man. Some other men were going to hurt a lot of people, and this man knew where they were going to attack and when. It was the first time I had gone anywhere with the team, and the first time I spent anytime around Jason Gideon. Your father and I watched as we watched Gideon ask question after question. I have to admit, I doubted Gideon at one point. I looked at your father and asked him if he thought Gideon knew what he was doing. Your father said, he worked with Gideon long enough to trust him. He said it with that look he has, where because he knows something to be true, you should believe it."

Samantha and Diane giggled. They knew that look.

"The thing is girls," Emily said," he was right. We fight out where the attack was, and your uncle Aaron and Uncle Derek were able to save a lot of people."

"But what about you and Daddy?" Samantha asked.

"What about us?"

"You didn't kiss? You didn't hug? You didn't play chess?" Samantha had a hard time imagining a time when her parents didn't hug each other or kiss each other or make cow eyes at each other. She really didn't know what it meant to make cow eyes, but she heard her Aunt Penelope use the phrase when describing Mommy and Daddy.

"No. I watched Gideon beat your father at chess."

"Daddy lost?" Samantha had seen her Daddy beat lots of people at chess. Mommy was the only person who could ever beat him.

"Gideon was extraordinary in many ways."

"But what about you and Daddy?"

"Like I said, it wasn't love at first sight. Love came later." Emily stood up, groaning just a bit as she did so. She bent over and kissed Samantha, "Good night." Then she bent over and kissed Diane, "Good night." She turned out the lights and went into her room.

She picked up the phone by the bed, and dialed Spencer's phone.

In a hotel room in Colorado, Spencer Reid picked up his cell phone.

"Are you asleep?" Emily asked.

"Yes." Ever since Emily started her maternity leave, she fussed if Spencer didn't get as much sleep as possible while on a case.

"Laying on the bed and reading doesn't count as sleeping, Dr. Reid."

"What makes you think I'm reading?" Of course he was, but he wasn't going to admit that to his wife.

"The moment you put this ring on my finger, I gained the ability to know when you're lying."

"Not many wives can do that, you know."

"What can I say, I'm one in a million."

"Oh, you're much more unique than that. Are you resting?"

"Of course. I just put the girls to sleep."

"I wish I was there."

"You talked to them while we ate dinner. They understand you being on adventures."

"I know they do. I'm so lucky to have a wife and two kids who understand. I still miss being there."

"We miss you two. Do know what they asked me tonight? They want to know when we fell in love."

"What did you tell them?"

"I told them it was a long story. So, when did you know you first know you loved me, Spencer?"

"The moment I met you."

"Awww, that's so sweet. Total malarkey, but sweet."

"When did you realize you loved me?"

"I've been thinking about it, I'm still not certain. I'm starting at the beginning, and I hope I'll know the exact moment as I tell it."

"See, if they asked me I wouldn't start there."

"So, where would you start?"

"When I apologized?"

"Which time?"

"After New Orleans."

"Ah… Well, when you get home, you can tell them all about it."

"You need to get some rest, Emily. You need it."

"So do you. Goodnight. I love you."

"I love you too."


	2. The Kind Hearted Magician

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The episodes referenced here are from the second season: "sex, birth, and death" and "Profiler, Profiled"

"Mommy, why is Daddy sad?"

Samantha's question caught Emily off-guard. Spencer had called them a few hours before to let them know the case was over. It had ended in a stand off, and the unsub hadn't survived. He was a young and very disturbed. Near the end of the call, Spencer had remarked the kid reminded him of Nathan Harris.

"You know how when we go on our adventures, we try to catch the bad guys? Well, sometimes we can't just catch them. Sometimes we have no choice and we have to kill them. When that happens, it makes Daddy very sad."

"Why? They're bad guys!"

Emily wondered if there was a parental merit badge for explaining the ethical quandary regarding respect for the sanctity of life while trying to achieve justice to a 6 year-old. "Sweetie, it's never good to have to kill someone. We try very hard not to do it. Also, …Remember when we talked about Nana Reid? How she is sick in a special way?"

"Yeah."

"Well, sometimes the people we try to catch, they're not evil so much as very sick, much worse than Nana Reid. This person, he was like that. When the bad guy is someone like that and despite all our efforts, we can't capture them alive, it makes your Daddy very sad."

"But why?"

"Because Daddy wants to help people, everyone. He thinks if he tries hard enough, he can fix everything."

"Can't he Mommy? He's very smart, you know."

Emily smiled. It was a long time since she thought being smart meant you knew to fix everything. "He is very smart, but there some things even he can't fix. He wishes he could though, so he gets sad. But you know what? He'll be home tomorrow, and seeing you two is going to make him very happy."

"Momma," Diane said, "Who's Nathan Harris?"

Diane had inherited Reid's powerful memory and a talent for hearing things whispered. "What dear?" Emily asked, hoping she misheard Diane's question.

"I heard Daddy say the bad guy reminded him of Nathan Harris. Who is he?"

Emily sighed. She was sorely tempted to make something up, but decided on honesty. "Nathan Harris is someone Daddy worries about a lot. We met him years ago, on one of our adventures. Remember how usually, the police invite us on these adventures? Well, this time we only knew about the bad guy because of Nathan. He approached your father, because he saw one of the bad guy's victims."

"So Nathan's a good guy?" Diane asked.

"Remember how I said some people are sick in the mind, like Nana Reid? Nathan was like that. Seeing the dead body made him feel happy and he knew that was wrong. He sought out your father, because Nathan was afraid he was becoming a bad guy."

"Did he? Become a bad guy, I mean?"

"We don't know. Gideon helped Nathan go to a hospital, like the one where Nana Reid lives."

"But something else happened, didn't it Mommy?" Samatha was getting really good at reading people.

"Yes it did. The night before he was going to the hospital, he hurt himself. He came close to hurting someone, so he hurt himself so bad he almost died. He would have died, if it wasn't for your father."

"But how did he know? Why was he there?" Diane asked.

"The person Nathan was with, she called your father, so Aunt Pen and your father went and saved Nathan."

"You're telling it wrong, mommy!" Samantha accused. "You went with Daddy and helped Nathan. Not Aunt Pen."

"No. Aunt Pen was with your father at the time. He was sad and she was trying to cheer him up."

"No, Mommy, _you_ cheer him up when he's sad. _You're_ the one he loves, not Aunt Pen. You're telling it wrong."

"I am now. When he's sad, I do everything I can to cheer him up. But back then, I didn't. I hardly knew him back then. I didn't seek him out, and he didn't turn to me. That didn't start happening to much later."

"But, Mommy..." Samantha was getting upset.

"Sam," Emily said, "it's OK. I love your father, very much, but like I said, it didn't happen from the start. It happened over time. When this happened, the adventure with Nathan Harris, you Daddy hadn't made me smile yet. Do you two want to hear about the first time Daddy made me smile?"

"Yes, oh, yes," they cried.

"After that, though, it's time to sleep. It happened when I was walking in to the BAU. I was thinking about a lot of other things, when I felt something hit me in the head, BOP! I didn't know what it was, and then I saw your father looking guilty. He apologized, but you Aunt Pen and Aunt JJ were just laughing."

"Was he doing physics magic?" Samantha asked. She loved it when Daddy did physics magic.

"Well, he said he was just demonstrating a physics principle. I asked him to show me. I smiled at him, but I didn't know why. Just the way you two do when he does physics magic for you. Of course, I had to turn around while he got everything ready. I asked him why, and do you know what he said?"

"A magician never reveals his secrets!" the girls said together.

"That's right. So, a few minutes later I saw a small piece of plastic sail through the air, and land at Uncle Aaron's feet. Even he smiled. That's a pretty good trick, isn't it?"

The girls nodded and a few minutes later, Emily turned off the light and left the girls to dream.

* * *

In his hotel room, Spencer Reid was hunched over a small table going through his notes. There had to have been a way to have prevented killing the unsub. What had he missed and when? Then his phone rang and he answered it.

"I know you're not sleeping Spencer." It was Emily.

"Sure I am."

"Spencer Reid, you are not even in your pajamas. Just tell me you're not reading case files."

Spencer looked around, he knew she wasn't in the room, but still...

"Put me on speaker and change into your pajamas. You need to sleep."

"I'm not tired."

"Yes, you are. You just won't admit it yet. Start changing and get to bed."

"Don't you have two children who need your attention there?"

"They're asleep. They're also worried about you. They both know you're sad."

"What did you tell them?"

"The truth. I had to tell them about Nathan Harris too."

"Emily, we talked about this."

"Yes, we did. Guess what? We're not a normal family. I'm sorry. And like it or not, your daughters are pretty sharp, both of them. When was the last time you saw Nathan?"

"I don't know. A few years ago."

"Maybe you should go see him. Check in on how he's doing."

"I'm not even certain where he is right now."

"Garcia could find him. Wouldn't you rather know than be uncertain?"

"I guess."

"And I think we need to visit your mother soon. She loves seeing the girls."

"Not now."

"I didn't say now. Later. After the baby is born. It might do you some good too, Spencer."

"When did you get so bossy?"

"You love it when I'm bossy."

"Not really."

"But you do love me, don't you Spencer?"

There was a catch in her voice, like she needed some reassurance. "I sure do. I do, I love you Emily."

"I love you too. Now get some sleep and I'll see you tomorrow."

Even though his mind told him he should review the case files, Spencer went to sleep and dreamed of having breakfast with his family.


	3. Defining Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Episodes Referenced: No Way Out

_BAU jet_

_Early 2007_

"Peas and chocolate? Are you kidding me, Dr. Reid?"

Spencer looked up from his book and saw Emily standing there . They were on the BAU jet heading home. It had been a rough case. They had come to Nevada to track down a man they had come to know as Frank. A sadist and probably the world's most prolific serial killer.

They had him.

They had him cornered in a diner, and they had to let him go. All because he had outsmarted them by kidnapping a busload of kids. They had saved the kids but Frank, and a mentally unstable woman named Jane, had slipped through their fingers. Everyone was feeling down about it.

"I'm sorry Emily?"

"At Jane's house, you said peas have the same chemicals as chocolate. Are you kidding me? " She sat down across from him, her eyes locking him in a baleful stare. "You just make stuff up sometimes, don't you? I guess nobody every checks your facts, do they? They just assume every word out Spencer Reid's mouth must be true."

"Are you doubting the accuracy of my facts?"

"Yes."

"Well, you can check it out when we get home. Garcia could run it through a search engine for you. Or did you come over for something else?"

"What do you mean?"

"It was a bad case. We saved the sheriff. We saved the kids, but Frank outsmarted us and we all know it. No one's playing games like we usually do. Gideon's going over in his mind where it went wrong. Morgan's listening to music. JJ's going over case files to see where we need to go next. Hotch is calling home to check on Hayley and Jack. I'm reading to distract myself. You've never been with on a case that ended like this, and you don't know what to do. So, you want someone to fight with and I'm it. So go ahead. Whatever is going to make you happy."

Reid put his book down and gave her his full attention. He didn't think it was possible, but her stare got even angrier. If she stared at him any harder, laser beams might come out of her eyes. Well, not really, that would be physically impossible. It would be very cool, though.

After a few moments, the anger in her eyes softened, to something more like bewilderment. It seemed to Reid as if she fighting a battle inside her head. Something was bothering her, maybe the problem wasn't that Frank had outsmarted them. Maybe something else was stumping her right now.

"Do you think he loves her?"

"What?"

"Do you think Frank really loves Jane?"

"What is love?"

"Not what you said when Hotch asked. It's not a bunch of brain chemistry. It can't be."

"That's what makes the whole mind-body problem interesting, Emily. Is there a soul? Is love just the chemical reactions in the brain? The body is an incredibly complex machine, the brain is an incredibly complicated organic computer. All of our emotions are related, at least in part to the chemistry."

"But that isn't all of it. It can't be."

"Why? Because it makes you feel better to have love not be just about biology? You want it be about sonnets and marriage and sacrifice."

"How about this? 'Love is patient. Love is kind. Love does not insist on its own way.'

"You and my mother would get along great. She hates it when I talk about brain chemistry. She thinks love is about the soul. She keeps saying love is the burning point of life."

"That's all well and good, but you haven't answered my question. Do you think Frank loves Jane?"

"I think _he_ thinks he loves her. She's probably the only person who looked at him, in his kill room, who didn't look at him in fear. I think that confused him, and he doesn't know how to process it. Maybe he thinks it has to be love. The problem is love is too broad a term to answer any questions about."

"What do you mean?"

"There's all kinds of love. There's love of country. JJ loves the Redskins, but I don't think she'd kill for them. Morgan loves his mother, but not the way he loves going out with women. Hotch loves his wife and his son. But he also loves this job and the law. But I don't think he would ever say he's in love with the law. Romantic love is different from sexual love. You quoted 1 Corinthians, the love St. Paul talked about isn't romantic love, but Christian love, also called agape. Those are two very different kinds of love. To just ask if Frank loves Jane is too broad a question."

Emily didn't speak at first. She was transfixed. Reid had an intensity when he launched into full lecture mode that was almost hypnotic, at least it was to her when there wasn't a case they were working on. When he stopped, it took her a moment to get her thoughts together.

"I think you know I meant romantic love. Does he love her, is it real love? Does he have the capacity for love?"

"I guess that's the reason I prefer the answer of brain chemistry. That answer is known for certain. The question you're asking, Emily, no one can know. We know a lot about human behavior, but understanding if any of us, let alone someone like Frank, can actually feel love is not a question I can answer with any certainty."

"I guess there some question even a genius doesn't know the answer to."

"Yet."

Later on, after the jet landed, Morgan approached Emily. "I'm sorry."

"About what?"

"I saw you talking with Reid. Sometimes he goes on and on, I hope it wasn't too painful."

"It was fun, actually. We were just continuing a conversation from earlier."

"Oh?"

"You know, it's nice to be able to talk with someone who doesn't mind mind getting theoretical. It nice to not feel like a freak when you're talking about the depth of human behavior. And you know what? He's easy to talk to." Then she walked off.

For a moment Derek moment was absolutely bewildered.

_Present Day_

_The Reid-Prentiss House_

_Kitchen table_

_Lunch time_

"Now listen you two," Emily told her daughters, "When Daddy gets home he's going to be a little tired. It was a tough adventure for him, remember? So, don't ask him a lot of questions."

"What do you mean Mommy?" Samantha did her best to look innocent.

"You two, especially you Samantha Rose, have been asking all kinds of questions. Let's just enjoy the fact that Daddy's home and not ask questions. You can ask him all of your questions tomorrow. Tonight, however, no questions."

Samantha was about to protest, but the look her mother gave made her reconsider. Instead she ate her sandwich.

"When will Daddy be home?" Diana asked.

"Before supper, sweetie."

"Why? I thought the adventure was over?"

"He has other things he has to do today at work sweetie. Going on adventures is just one part of his job. That's why when he comes home, we don't want to ask him a lot of questions. He's going to be a little tired. So, let's just make him feel welcome."

It was several hours later that Spencer Reid came home. As soon as he walked in the door, Samantha and Diane squealed with delight," Daddy!" They ran to him. He crouched down and hugged them.

"Oh I missed you two so much."

"We missed you too Daddy," Samantha said.

"Yes daddy, we missed you."

"Did we ever Daddy." Spencer looked up and saw Emily. People think having an eidetic memory means you remember everything exactly as it is, but always seemed to Reid that he never remembered exactly how beautiful his wife was.

He hugged Emily, "I missed you too."

He hugged her for a long time, perhaps a little harder than he meant to.

"Spencer, are you trying to induce labor?"

"What?"

"If you squeeze any harder, you might squeeze your son out of me."

"Oh. I'm sorry." He let go of her.

"Dinner will be ready in a few minutes."

A few hours later both Spencer and Emily were tucking the girls in bed. Emily sat in a chair, suddenly feeling tired. Then Samantha, sensing an opportunity, said, "Daddy, can I ask one question, please?"

"Only one?" He almost laughed.

"Mommy said we shouldn't ask any questions, cuz you'd be tired."

Spencer smiled. "Let me let you in on a secret. Mommy worries a whole lot about us."

"I can hear you two." Emily said. "I just catching my breath, I'm not asleep."

"So what's your question?" Reid asked.

"When did you and Mommy fall in love?"

"What do you mean?"

Emily smiled. She put her hands over her mouth to keep from laughing.

"You know, Daddy, when did you and Mommy know you loved each other. Mom doesn't know."

"Well, that's a pretty hard question."

"It is not!"

"Sure it is. Do you mean when did I fall in love with her? Or when did she fall in love with me? Or when did we know we loved each other? And which time? What kind of love?"

"What?" The way she asked it, in an irritated tone, sounded just like her mother.

"We loved each other as friends, long before we wanted to be more than friends. And it took us a while to know we loved each other. Sometimes, it's very hard for adults to realize they're in love with someone. So, what exactly is it you're asking?"

Samantha opened her mouth several times, but couldn't think of the answer. Like a good sister, Diana helped her out.

"She means when did you and Mommy know you loved each other and wanted to be Mommy and Daddy."

"Oh, is that what you wanted to know? Well, that is a bit of a story. I'm just a bit too tired to tell it tonight. But, I will tell you this, for a long time your mother and I loved each other. The problem was, we thought the other person didn't love us."

"So when did you figure it out," Diana asked.

"Well, it took a while. It took a long time. It is, however, much too late tonight to tell how it happened, but I promise I will tell you more about it tomorrow."


	4. Pillow Talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Episodes Referenced: Catching Out, Angel Maker, Minimal Loss

Not long after the girls were asleep, Spencer and Emily went to bed as well. After they were snuggled together, Spencer said, "I didn't realize how spoiled I was."

"What do you mean?"

"When we're working together, and we're on a case, we can do this in the hotel rooms. When it's just me…I feel like something's missing. It's because I don't have you next to me."

"I feel the same way when you're not here. " She started to absently stroke his hair. She felt his hand rest gently on her belly. It was warm and comforting. "I'm curious about one thing, Spencer."

"Yeah?"

"Just what are you planning on telling the girls tomorrow night.? About how it started. Because I'm not really certain what I was going to tell them."

"I was going to start with the talk."

"What talk?"

"You know, about baby geniuses."

"You think that's the best place to start?"

"I thought explaining all the times I felt something, but I don't think I'll be able to explain it to them properly. Maybe when they're older.

"What do you mean, all the times? Just when did you start feeling something for me, any way?"

"We've talked about it before."

"No we haven't. Not really. When did you start have feelings for me, Dr. Reid?

"What does it matter?"

"It matters to your pregnant wife who's been fielding questions from your daughters while your son dances, punches, and kicks my bladder. So, when did it start? I'd like to know how long it took you to realize you loved me."

Spencer _knew_ he had somehow entered dangerous territory and this could end very badly. Fortunately, he been thinking about this on the flight home and off and on during the day.

"Well, I think I've always found you attractive. But, if you mean when did the feeling really start to percolate, it was during the Angel Maker case."

"Really? How so?"

"Well, you remember the case?"

"Trust me Spencer, that case is burned into my mind. First of all, it's not often forensic evidence suggests a serial killer has come back from the dead. Then there was your evil twin/eviler twin hypothesis on the plane."

"Yeah, in retrospect that wasn't my best profiling moment. Well, you remember the letters I had to de-code."

"Yeah. I know what's coming. You did this brilliant job decoding them and I made fun of you. I'm sorry."

"There's nothing to apologize for. And you have apologized for that about 42 times since then."

"I felt bad. It was wrong of me to do that. That was the one of the other reasons that case is burned in my mind. You did this amazing job of deciphering the letters, and I didn't say good job or anything encouraging. I just poked you in the face and make a joke at your expense."

Tears began to run down her face. He gently wiped them away with his delicate fingers.

"Two days."

"What?"

"Two days later I could still feel the sensation of your finger on my cheek, and hear you saying, 'he seems so life like.' in my head."

He gently kissed her forehead. "You know Emily, there was a time that would have angered me. There was a time when I would have pouted and sulked if someone made that kind of a joke. But then, the truth was, I felt a kind of jolt of electricity when you touched my cheek with your finger. The truth was, I thought about kissing you on more than one occasion. The truth was, I wondered if I could have a relationship with you that was more than teammates or friends. But I figured that you had a type of man you dated, and I was sure it was the opposite of me."

She just looked at him. How had they never talked about this before? She hugged him close to her. He could feel tears run down her cheeks. When she loosened her grip she kissed him passionately. When their lips parted, he tried to speak.

"Uh, Em…We need to be careful her because…"

She put her hand over his mouth. "Do you know what was going through my mind for days after that case? Shara Carlino. Do you remember her? She was one of the Angel Maker's girlfriends. When Rossi and I interviewed her she said to me 'you've never been in love, have you?' I couldn't put the words out of my head. The words hurt, because they were true. There had men in my life: friends, friends with benefits, lovers, boyfriends, and one fiancé. But I never loved them, not really. Not deeply."

"Emily…I…"

"Let me finish, Spence. When I poked you and made that cheap shot; and that's what it was, a cheap shot to get a cheap laugh. It wasn't a reaction to what you said or to that almost mind-blowing analysis that would have taken three mere mortals and a specially programmed computer to do." She paused for a moment, the mere memory of it seemed to have potency to her. "While you narrated how you deciphered the Angel Makers love letters, the mere narration made something like butterflies flutter in my stomach. I still feel them. It felt like I was developing some kind of school-girl crush, and I thought that's all it could ever be. I mean, you were still a bit of a mystery to me. I wasn't even certain if you had romantic feelings for anyone or any kind of sexual desires. If you did, I was certain they wouldn't be for me. I… Maybe some one closer to your age. I was trying to squash those feelings. It was a cheap shot, and I will always regret it. I'm…"

He interrupted her by kissing her passionately. When there lips parted she said,"I thought we had to be careful."

"Yeah, well, that's in case you still were uncertain about my romantic and sexual feelings towards you. So, here's what I've been wondering about. Seeing as you were having these feelings of love and guilt, is that why you said you were the FBI agent at Benjamin Cyrus's ranch a few weeks later?"

"I still don't know. When I saw him point the gun at you I knew you were going to try and talk your way out of it. It might have worked, but all I could think about was he was going to shoot you. If he pulled the trigger you would be dead and I couldn't allow that. I didn't why then, and I'm not certain exactly now, but I knew I couldn't allow that."

"It killed me inside to see him drag you away. Later, when we were gathered in the chapel, it killed me a little more to see how badly he beat you. It should have been me."

"No. If it should have been anyone it should have been that idiot State Attorney General who ordered the raid while we were there and leaked that there was an undercover FBI agent there." Then she let out a small laugh.

"What?"

"On the plane ride back, after it was all over, I could still feel that hug…after I thought you might be dead, I still felt that hug and I was mad at myself. I was still trying to fight these feelings for you. I kept telling myself you were just a team mate, and you could never be more. "

"Then why did you try to put me at ease, and tell me it wasn't my fault?"

"Because I knew you'd blame yourself and I had to reassure you. I felt that need just as strongly as I had to stop Cyrus from shooting you."

"You know, when we talked then, and you touched my wrists…I could almost believe that some day we could be more than team mates. But only almost."

"Oh God, some profilers we are. We couldn't see what we were feeling for each other."

"Well, it wasn't all that long before we figured it out."

"But it wasn't when we talked about babies."

"No. But that started things."

"I wonder what would have happened if we had managed to figure things out sooner."

"I'm not sure it matters."

"Maybe." She snuggled closer to him, putting her head on his chest. She fell asleep listening to the beating of his heart.

He fell asleep being grateful he was home, and that home meant a family with Emily.


	5. Rough Start

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The episodes referenced are: Catching Out, The Instincts, and Memoriam

_Fall 2008_

As the elevator doors closed, Morgan felt relief at escaping the teasing from Reid and Prentiss. It was bad enough that the woman he had been trying to flirt with knew his name before he gave it. Now, it turned out, she was going to be the unit liaison while JJ was on maternity leave. Morgan wasn't quite sure how he felt about that. But he was in no mood to listen to Emily and Reid harass him about it.

As Morgan left them behind, Reid looked at Emily and said," Do you still want to get something?"

"Absolutely. I'm starved."

About 15 minutes later they were at a modest diner having burgers. They had been laughing about Morgan being caught off-guard about Agent Todd.

"You never answered my question, Reid."

"About what?"

"About baby geniuses."

"What do you mean?"

"Have you ever thought about having them some day?'

"You know, there's no guarantee any child of mine would be a genius. I mean, there's no way to prove genetics have anything to do with any intellectual abilities people possess."

She sighed. "You know what I meant. Have you ever thought about having kids one day?"

"Not really. I mean, sure I'd like to have a family someday, I guess."

"You guess?"

"It's not very likely. I mean, it would require a woman, and let's face it Morgan's joke about me only needing to remember one name isn't too far off the mark. It's not very likely I'm going to have that kind of relationship with a woman."

"Don't sell yourself short Reid. You just haven't had relationship, _yet._ I think it's only a matter of time."

"Maybe. Even if that's case, you realize any child of mine has the potential to have schizophrenia passed to them. It's possible."

"Possible. But even so, are saying you don't want to have kids?"

"No. I'm just not sure it will happen or if it does that it will go well. I mean, between Hotch and Rossi they have four wives. That doesn't speak well to the hope of a good family life doing this job."

"But I know you, and I think you would find a way to make it work."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because of how much you love your mother."

"I don't understand."

"A lot of people I know would just leave her in an institution and forget about her."

"I did put her in an institution."

"And you write her a letter everyday. You visit her when you can, and you love her. I see that in you every time you talk about her."

Reid looked down at his burger, not sure what to say to that. Then he looked up and asked," What about you?"

"Me?"

"Do you want to have kids someday?"

"Very much so. I'm like you though, I'm not sure it's going to happen."

"Why?"

"Well, like you said, it's hard to maintain a relationship with this job."

"But you could make it work."

"That's nice to say, but that's only part of the problem."

"What do you mean?"

"At my age, it would be a high risk pregnancy, so I just don't think it's a good idea."

"Actually, Emily…" and Reid went off detailing how, while Emily was over 35, multiple successful pregnancies were still possible for her.

_Present Day_

_The Reid-Prentiss household_

_Bed time_

Samantha and Diane were nestled into their beds. Spencer leaned down and gave each of them a kiss on their foreheads, when both girls cried out in protest. "Daaaaad."

"What? What is it?" he had a look of total bewilderment.

"You were going to tell us how it all began. How you and Mommy fell in love."

"Oh, was I?"

"Daaaad." Spencer's daughters had learned long ago if protested long enough, he usually gave in. When he smiled, they knew he was teasing them. Naughty Daddy.

"Well, I have to warn you, it wasn't the best of beginnings."

"You and Mommy keep saying that, but you won't tell us how it started." Samantha said.

"Well, I guess you have to say it started when Aunt JJ was getting ready to have Henry. You see, your mommy looked at Aunt JJ one day and asked me if I wanted to be a Daddy. Now, she didn't mean with her. Not yet, anyway. Both of us wanted to be parents, but we were both equally certain it wouldn't happen."

"Why not?" Samantha asked.

"Because neither one us thought we would find someone who would love us."

"That's silly, Daddy. Didn't you know you loved each other yet?" Samantha said.

Diane giggled.

"The truth is, we didn't realize we loved each other yet. I knew how felt about her. She knew how she felt about me. The problem was, we weren't brave enough to tell each other yet. Until, one night, after Henry was born, I went to see your mother."

"And you told her you loved her?" Samantha asked.

"No. But she told me she loved me."

"Good."

"Well, not exactly," Spencer said.

"What do you mean?"

"I didn't believe her."

_Fall 2008_

_Emily Prentiss's Brownstone_

Emily was more than a little surprised that Reid had called. He had a rough few days. They had been on a case in his hometown of Las Vegas and he had been plagued by nightmares the whole time. It turned out that he was remembering a friend of his who was killed when he was young. While the team returned home, Reid stayed to investigate.

In the course of the investigation, Reid had to face the father who had left him. Reid thought his father had killed Riley Jenkins. It had turned out to be a pedophile, who Riley Jenkin's father killed afterwards. She knew the case had wore him out emotionally.

JJ could see it too.

But not long after they left JJ and her baby in the hospital, Reid had called Emily. Could he come over, he asked. He needed someone to talk to. So here he was, in her brownstone. He hadn't really said anything, he just sat there.

"Are you OK, Reid," she asked.

"JJ asked me to be Henry's godfather."

"That's good, you'll be a good godfather."

"I don't see how."

"Spencer, you'll be fine. You just have to be a good person, and you're a natural at that."

"No, I'm not. My father never Vegas was. He could have walked into our lives any time he wanted to. I could have found him. I never tried. Not when I was a kid. Not when I committed Mom. Not after I joined the FBI. Never. What kind of a son doesn't think to look for his father?"

"That isn't you're fault. Spencer look at me."

Until Spencer felt her hand lift his chin, he didn't realize he had been looking down. He was staring in her eyes. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know why he had wanted to be here.

"You are a good person. The best person I know. That's why JJ asked you to be Henry's godfather. You should be a father."

"No. No, I appreciate what you're saying but…"

"I love you." The words came out before she could stop them.

"What?" He seemed shocked. He couldn't believe what she had just said.

She knew she could backtrack if she chose to, but she didn't.

"I love you. How could I not? You are a good man. You could have done anything with your life you chose to, but you chose to help people. You stayed behind to solve a case people buried. You believed in the system, and that's why you saw it through. You're worried about being a good godfather. You would be a good father. And a husband. And you're the only one I would ever want to have a baby with. I love you."

"No."

"No?"

"You think you do, right now, but you don't. You want to have a baby, a desire made more visceral now that JJ had Henry. You like me, and "

"Stop talking Reid. Just stop talking right now. As a matter of fact, get out. Just go."

_Present day_

_Reid-Prentiss house_

"Daddy? Are you okay?" It was Diane.

Spencer Reid had been quiet for a while. The memory of rejecting Emily like that was too much for him to bear right now.

"That's all for tonight. I'll tell you more tomorrow." He kissed them and left the room.

"Mommy?" Samantha was worried.

"It was an emotional night, that first time. And Daddy…he feels bad he didn't believe me. I told you, this wasn't an easy story to tell. He'll be okay. You two, just sleep. It will be okay in the morning."

A few minutes later, Emily found Reid in his study. He was hunched over books and folders. Just about anyone else would assume he was working. But Emily knew better. She knew how potent his memory could be, and she knew how much right now he was beating himself up for the night he rejected her. This was one of the hard parts of being Spencer Reid. The hard part of loving him, was knowing how little she could do to make the pain go away.

"You know, I don't blame you at all for that night. I forgave you for that a long time ago. Plus, it was pretty artless of me to just come out and say it like that. So, come on, let's go to bed."

"I've got to work a little. You go to bed, though, you need your rest."

"Spencer, you're not working. You're brooding and we both know it. The crazy thing is, there's no real reason to brood. That woman you didn't believe? She's your wife now. We have two beautiful daughters with a son on the way. Everything worked out. What does it matter how it started?"

"It matters to me. I put you through Hell."

"No. No you didn't. You feel like that now. But you didn't." Emily knew it was pointless. He would pretend to work, then go to bed. So she turned away and went to bed.

"Em." Reid called out. She turned around. "Do you think my Dad ever felt bad? Do you think he beat himself up for leaving me and Mom? All those years of living in the same city, did it ever bother him?"

"I don't know. Maybe you should ask him sometime. Don't stay up too late. You need your rest too."

And with that, she went to bed.


	6. Surprises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The episode referenced here is 52 Pickup.

_The Reid-Prentiss Household_

_The next morning_

When Emily woke up, Spencer had already gone into work. He never went to bed. It wouldn't be the first time he slept on the couch in his study, rather than come to bed. However, usually when he did that it was because the two of them were fighting.

Being married to a genius wasn't for the faint of heart. Especially when something was bothering him, because he didn't always talk about it. More often than not, he retreated inside himself when that happened. Emily was now certain she misread him last night. She should have engaged him more. Something more profound than that night was bothering him. Something about his father. She would have to talk to him tonight.

She got the girls ready for school. Before they left for the bus stop, Sam asked "Where's Daddy?"

"He went to work early, dear."

"Is he on an adventure?"

"No, he just needed to work on something early."

"He's still upset from last night, isn't he Mommy?" Diane asked.

"A little bit. But it's all right. Everything will be fine, don't worry."

"Is it our fault Mommy?" Diane asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Because we kept asking about how you fell in love? Is it our fault Daddy's so sad?"

"No. It is absolutely not your fault. Listen to me, both of you, Daddy is sad because…I'm not entire why. It might have something to do with Grandpa Reid. Remember how he Grandpa left your Daddy when he was young? Well, Daddy still gets very sad about that. He may be thinking about that right now. So, what we need to do is make sure Daddy know how much we love him. Can we do that when he gets home tonight?"

The girls nodded.

Emily smiled. "Good. Now let's get going for school."

_Fall 2008_

_BAU offices_

They just got back from a case in Atlanta, GA. The unsub, his name was Robert Parker, had taken classes on picking up women from a self-proclaimed dating expert named Viper. In the course of the investigation, Reid had given his card to a bartender named Austin while giving her the profile. She recognized Robert and managed to prevent a woman from being his next victim. Then she called Reid right before the unsub took her. The team arrived just in time to save her.

Now that they were home, she had called Reid. In fact she had not just called Reid, she sent him his card back, with a kiss on the back. He explained about transference to her, about what she was feeling. She insisted it was something else, but he politely suggested she waited for a little while before she thought it was something more.

When he hung up the phone, he heard part of the conversation Jordan Todd, Penelope Garcia, Emily Prentiss, and Derek Morgan were engaged in.

"I still can't believe he said women want to date jerks," Garcia said.

"That's not what Viper was saying," Reid said.

Everyone turned around to face him.

"Excuse me?" Reid heard the anger mixed with disbelief from Emily.

"What he tries to teach them is confidence. I'll grant you he obvious thinks of women as objects and not people. But women do respond to confidence. Men do too. A sexually confident women can be very attractive to a man."

"Are you saying these things work?" Jordan asked.

"In the right context, sure."

"Context?" Even Morgan was intrigued.

"In a club, with low lighting, almost everyone with impaired judgment because of alcohol. Many of the people there for casual sex or even casual dates. People looking for something more, those are the people it won't work on." He paused for a minute. " You know, my Mom always told me when you're ready, the right girl comes along."

"Really?" Emily said," What if that happens and you're too stupid to realize it. What if the right girl comes along, tells you how she feels, and all you do is blather about transference? Or maybe you think the right girl is a bartender." Then Emily stalked off.

Reid looked over at Morgan and said," What just happened?"

"Don't look at me. I haven't a clue."

"Really?" Jordan asked. "You two are the profilers, and you don't see that Emily likes Dr. Reid. And I don't mean like as in 'you're a good friend'. I mean likes him as in 'let's see each other naked'. Don't tell me I'm the only one who noticed it."

But everyone just looked at her like she was crazy.

* * *

_Present Day_

_Reid-Prentiss Household_

_After the girls left for school_

It was abut an hour later when Emily was sitting in the recliner. The doctor wanted her to take it easy. Actually, Spencer wanted her to take it easy more than the doctor. They never told the girls how hard it was when they were born. The team didn't know either, since they were away when she went into labor.

Not even Garcia knew how bad it went. Spencer only told everyone that Emily was in labor for 19 hours. He didn't go into details. They decided for this pregnancy that Emily would take things easy. She hated it, but at least she didn't have to be in the hospital.

The only good things about being home was opening time with the girls, and being able to catch up on reading. That's what she was doing when the phone rang. When she picked it up, Hotch was on the other end.

"Emily," he said," I hate to do this, but something has happened."

"What do you mean? What happened?"

"Spencer's been shot."

"What are talking about? I didn't know you had a case."

"We don't. One of the agents in the office just broke up with his girlfriend. He blamed Anderson for it, and decided to take it out on him today. Spencer stopped him, but he got shot in the process. Morgan's on his way to pick you up and take you to the hospital."

"If he isn't here in fifteen minutes, I'm driving myself."

Morgan, as it turned out, made before Emily felt the need to drive herself there. The whole drive to the hospital, Emily kept thinking, 'Not now. Don't take him now.' She realized she was praying. She wasn't ready to lose him, not now. Not like this.

At the the hospital, the doctor told her, "he's lost a lot of blood. He's in surgery right now. As soon as we know anything, we 'll tell you."

"How bad is it?" she asked.

"We're not sure yet. Once we've got the bleeding under control, we'll have a better idea."

Emily turned around and saw everyone there. "Who did the shooting?" she asked.

"His name's Cooper." Hotch said. "He's in custody now."

"Was anyone else hurt?"

"No. Reid was able to stop him before anyone go hurt."

"I see. Excuse for a moment. I need to make a call."

Everyone offered to make the call for her, but she insisted. She walked outside, and pulled out her cell phone. When a woman answered, Emily asked to be connected to William Reid. A few minutes later he answered.

"Emily? Is everything all right?"

"No, it's not. Spencer's been shot. I don't know if he will make it. Do you why he got shot? Because he went into work early. Because something's been bothering him. You. He's afraid he's not a good father. He's afraid he will leave his family like you did. There is something you two need to work out. Right now, it's possible that our girls and his son won't have a father. So you need to get your happy ass down here. I don't care what you have going on right now, if you don't get on a plane and come here to help your son, I am going to have you arrested and brought here, do you understand me?"


	7. Daddy's Sleeping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The episodes reference here are: "Demonology" and "52 Pickup"

_The Hospital_

_Present Day_

After Emily talked with William Reid, she went back in and sat down. All eyes were on her. They saw her wince.

"Are you all right?" Hotch asked.

"I'm fine. Little Matthew, however, it upset. Or maybe he's antsy. He likes to start punching me in here every so often. At least he's not sitting on my bladder." She stared at her belly. "Not now. Please. When Daddy's all better, you can dance the freakin' Macarena if you want to. Right now, however, I need you to be still."

She sighed. She was waiting for Spencer to tell her that didn't make any sense.

JJ knew what Emily was thinking, and she put a reassuring hand on hers. Emily smiled at her in appreciation of the gesture.

"So who did you have to call?" JJ asked.

"Reid's father."

"Why?"

Emily sighed. She wasn't sure how much to tell. Then she decided she needed to tell someone and if not the team, then who?

"He went in to early this morning, didn't he?"

Morgan nodded. "Yeah. He didn't really say why. Is something wrong?"

She nodded. "The girls have been asking about how we go started, Spencer and I."

"We wouldn't mind knowing that either."

"You know that story already, Derek."

"No we don't." Derek said. "We know you two were going out when Reid got shot in the knee, because you read him the riot act in the hospital. But we don't know when you two started going out. You never told us."

"Well, we started telling the girls. The problem is that the start was a little rough."

"Rough?"

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Derek. It started when JJ was pregnant with Henry."

"Really?" JJ asked.

"Yeah. We started talking about whether we thought either one of us would ever be a parent."

"Well, that's a little different but I wouldn't call it a rough start," Morgan said.

"Except that when he got back from the Riley Jenkins case, right after JJ asked him to be Henry's godfather he came over. He was a mess. He had just been through an emotional roller coaster. We started talking, and I just told him I loved him."

"You didn't." Garcia said.

"Honestly, I don't know where it came from. It just came out, but I knew if I took it back I would never utter those words again. And he didn't believe me, so I was pissed at for a while."

"Then what changed?" Morgan asked.

"My friend Matthew Benton died. You remember that case, right?"

"Yeah." Her friend was one of a group of young men who went to confront a priest. After the priest died, one of his friends had a psychotic break and performed exorcisms on the young men, resulting in their deaths. The BAU stopped him and he was sent back home for his government to deal with him.

"Well, he stayed with me that night, and … Let's just say he provided a lot of comfort. And even more the next day."

"What a minute," Hotch said," you mean when he called in to say he was staying with you to keep an eye on you…"

"His eyes were on me pretty much the whole time. The point is, he has always felt bad about not believing me. So, when he told the girls about it, well it stirred up some emotions. I think it also stirred up something about his Dad. So, I called William to tell him to come here. I'm not going to have Spencer recover from getting shot just to go through …William Reid is going to be a help to Spencer if I have to put a gun to his head to do it."

* * *

_Winter 2009_

_Outside a church_

Emily didn't know how long she had been walking. She could stop thinking about Matthew. She knew the priest was the one who killed him. She knew that, but she couldn't help but feel responsible. She had lost touch with Matthew. After all he did for her, she lost touch. Because it was convenient.

She owed him. If she didn't have him back then… She put him on his path. It was her fault. She didn't want to believe it, but she knew it was true.

She realized she was in front of a church. She should go in. She should pray. For Matthew. She moved toward the door, then stopped.

No. She couldn't. Not in a church. Not now. Maybe not ever.

She looked up. It was starting to snow. Give me a sign, she thought. She didn't even know who she was asking anymore. God. The universe. Matthew?

Then she turned around to see….Spencer Reid standing there.

"What are you doing here?"

"Looking for you. I thought you might find yourself near a church. Maybe you should go in. I'll going with you, if you like. I'm not big on faith, but I don't think you should be alone. Not tonight."

"And you think you know what's best for me? The great Spencer Reid knows everything right? I don't need you. Go away."

He shook his head. "No. Not this time. I'm not leaving this time."

"I don't need you. I don't need you to fix me." She glared at him and spoke through clenched teeth. "I. Don't. Need. You. To. Fix. Me."

"I'm not trying to fix you.," he said. "I'm just here. Go ahead and get mad. Once you're done yelling at me, you can talk about the real problems. I've got all night. Go ahead. Get mad."

"Leave me alone." Her look went from angry to downright murderous. He wrapped his arms around her, and drew her into a hug. "Leave me alone." She hissed. Her hands were clenched in fists, and she started hitting his chest. "Leave me alone."

"No. I know you're mad. You've been mad at me for awhile, and you're right to be. So go ahead, be mad. I can take it."

She kept hitting and then she stopped. Tears come forth like a mighty waterfall and she started crying. "That's it," he said," just let it all out."

"It's my fault." She said through her tears. "It's all my fault."

"No, it's not. It's not. I promise you Emily, it's not."

"You don't know that Spencer. You don't know."

"Then tell me about it." He let go of her. She hadn't realize how strong his embrace was until it was no longer there. In it's absence she realized how safe she felt in it. This was a Spencer Reid she hadn't seen before.

He held her hand as they walked. She told him everything. About getting pregnant as a teenager. How Matthew Benton was there for her. About the abortion. About his confrontation with their priest. How he had been troubled ever since.

She told him more things. About failed relationships. How she had lost contact with Matthew. How her engagement fizzled out. All of it, of course, was her fault.

When they stopped walking, they found themselves in front of Emily's Brownstone.

Reid turned so he was facing Emily and looked directly into her eyes. The anger was gone, now there was just profound sadness.

"I'm not trying to fix you, but there is something you should hear."

"What?"

"It's not your fault."

"Spencer…"

"No, it isn't. You blame yourself for Matthew because you think you destroyed his faith. You're wrong. Martin Luther said 'Faith, like light, should be simple and unbending while love, like warmth, should bend to every need of our brethren.' Matthew believed that, but he found the clergy espoused a more fundamentalist and law based interpretation of scripture. One that didn't allow for compassion or mercy. He was always going to struggle with this."

"Maybe. But you don't know that."

"I'm fairly certain of it. More importantly, _he_ made his own choices. You didn't force him into anything. You made your own choices, which lead you do where now. A member of the BAU, who catches bad people and tries to protect people. The only thing you may be guilty of is being human. You didn't cause Matthew's death. You are a good person."

She was quiet. Spencer had an intensity that was almost hypnotic. "Thank you Spencer. I guess I needed some one to say that to me."

"I'm not done. There's more. It isn't your fault."

"Okay, I get it."

"It _isn't_ your fault."

"Okay. I believe you."

" _It_ isn't your fault."

"Fine."

"It isn't _your_ fault."

"Stop it."

He wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug. "It isn't Emily. You are a good person. You deserve to be loved."

"Ok."

"I love you."

"You don't need to say that."

"I love you."

"Spencer, I appreciate this, but…."

"I love you."

"Stop it."

"I love you."

"Reid, just stop it." Her voice was thick with emotion. She could feel tears coming down her cheeks.

He held her chin in one hand, forcing her to look into his eyes. "Emily Prentiss, I love you."

As she looked into his eyes, she remembered what Viper said. That affection, true affection couldn't be faked. He was speaking from his heart now. Like she did that night. For the rest of her life, Emily would never be sure exactly who started the kiss. She just knew their lips met. It was gentle and tentative at first, then it became more and more passionate. When it ended, she looked at him and said,"Maybe we should go inside."

"Okay."

* * *

_Present Day_

_The Hospital_

"Mrs. Reid?"

Emily looked up. The doctor was back. Emily stood up and he explained that Spencer was out of surgery. He still lost a lot of blood, but he was stable. They just had to watch him, and wait for him to regain consciousness.

"Can I see him?" she asked.

The doctor wanted her to wait a few minutes, but then she could. When she did, he looked so still. She didn't know if he could hear her or not, but she hoped so.

"I'm mad at you Spencer. You didn't come to bed last night, and you went in early. I bet anything, you wouldn't have gotten shot if you didn't go in early. I should be saying nice things to you, but…You're not allowed to die. I want you to understand that. I'm going to get the girls, but I want you to know that you are not allowed to die. Not now, not ever. When I'm on my death bed, maybe, _maybe_ I'll give you permission to die then. So, when I bring the girls back, you need to be awake. You _need_ to be okay."

She leaned down and kissed him. " I love you." She told him.

Emily came out of his room and joined everyone else.

"I need to pick up the girls," she said.

"I can get Will to do that," JJ said.

"No. Thank you, but no. They'll know something's wrong for sure. I want to tell them so they're ready for what comes next."

"At least let me drive you Emily."

"Ok, let's go."

As they drove to the bus stop, JJ asked, "So what are you going to tell them?"

"That Daddy's sleeping."


	8. Waking Up Daddy

_Winter 2009_

_Emily Prentiss' Brownstone_

_Morning_

Emily Prentiss was waking up slowly. The last few days had been emotionally draining. Last night however…

Emily reached over, hoping to find Spencer Reid still laying next to her. But all her hand found was an empty spot where Reid once was. She felt a pang of profound disappointment. It wasn't the first time a man left after a night of passion, she just hadn't expected that from Spencer Reid. Especially not since last night, he was such a gentle lover. His kisses, which he delivered all over her body, were soft, delicate and sensual. It wasn't just his kisses, but the feeling of his hands touching her all over. He knew just where to touch, and how. She never felt like this with any man, not a single past lover. She had hoped to wake up with him still there.

Was it a dream? Did she dream the whole thing? Was none of it real?

She got out of bed, and moved towards the kitchen. That's when she smelled the coffee. She looked around, hoping that meant Reid was still there. She didn't see Reid, but discovered he had brewed a pot of coffee before he left. She poured herself a cup, and was drinking when she heard the door open. She almost jumped out of her skin. Coming through the door was Spencer Reid, his messenger bag slung over one shoulder, a few shopping bags in one hand and his cell phone in the other. He was actually talking on the cell phone as he entered.

"No, Hotch, she's fine. I just think it might be a good idea if someone stayed with her. Yes, I agree. I'll tell her not to come in until Monday. I'll make sure she's okay. Don't worry. Thanks Hotch " Reid hung up the phone before he realized Emily was standing there.

"Hey." He said.

"Hey yourself."

"I wanted to get back before you were up. I just needed to get a chance of clothes. And I got some things to make breakfast with."

"I see. What about Hotch?"

"I just asked to use some leave today. He doesn't want you back before Monday. You need to take a break before you go back to work."

"How much did you tell him?"

"About what?"

"About last night."

"I told him I spent a little time with you and you're a little wore out, emotionally. I didn't give him any details. I didn't think he needed to know."

"I see. So, you're going to take care of me, is that it?"

"Yeah."

"Really? And how are you going to do that?"

"Well, I thought some breakfast and maybe if there something you needed help with around here done."

"House work? That's your plan? I never pictured you as a domestic type."

"Emily, my mother is a paranoid schizophrenic who doesn't eat or bathe unless she takes her meds and is properly supervised. Who do you think did most of the cooking, cleaning, and made sure every one bathed?"

"I never it gave much thought till now. What I meant was, does that mean last night was a one time thing? Because if it was, that just cruel."

"Cruel? I don't understand."

"What I mean, Spencer, is it's cruel teasing to give me the best sex of my life and to deprive me of it. Then there's the part where you said you loved me. If you didn't mean it…"

"I meant it. I still do. I do love you Emily, and I didn't mean to suggest last night was a one time thing. I just didn't want to presume too much. I mean, I didn't want you to think I'm here just for sex, that's all."

"I don't." Then she kissed him, and wrapped her arms around him.

* * *

_Present Day_

_The school bus stop_

Samantha and Diane Prentiss-Reid got off the bus to see their Mommy there waiting for them, which was a surprise. She usually waited for them at home. Then they saw Aunt JJ was with her.

"Why is Aunt JJ here Mommy?" Diane asked.

"She's going to give us a ride, sweetie."

"Where?"

Emily had rehearsed this conversation in her head, but she still felt totally unprepared for the question. "We have to go to the hospital. Daddy's hurt.. A man tried to hurt people at his office. Daddy stopped him from hurting anyone else, but he hurt Daddy."

"But," Samantha said," you said he wasn't going on a adventure."

"That's thing about adventures. Sometimes you don't intend to have one, then you find yourself in the middle of one."

"Is Daddy going to die?" Diane asked her question in a small voice filled with some of the same fear Emily felt.

Emily looked at her daughters and mustered as much courage and confidence as she could. "You two listen to me, your father is the strongest, bravest man I know. He's going to be fine. Do you understand? Now, we're going to go to the hospital and make sure he knows how much we love him. He's not awake, but he'll know we're there. Come on."

As they drove there, Emily started talking to the girls. "Do you remember what we talked about last night? About how I told you're father I loved him and he didn't believe me?"

"Yes," Samantha said.

"Well, I was mad at him for that. In fact, I was mad at him for a long time. But then, when I needed him the most, he was there."

"When was that, Mommy?" Samantha asked.

"What's your brother's name going to be?"

"Matthew," Diane said, "like your friend."

"Yes, my friend. Do you remember the rest of that story?"

"He died, " Samantha said. "The priest monster killed him. But you and Daddy and the team caught him."

"that's right. But that didn't mean I wasn't sad about Matthew. I was walking, just walking hoping the sadness would go away. Then, as I was walking, your father found me. You know how he holds you when you cry, when you two think you'll never be happy again?"

"Yeah" both girls nodded their heads, each having a specific memory of when they were that sad and Daddy held them until the sadness left them.

"That's how he held me, and then he told me he loved me. That's when we both knew we loved each other. Now, it's our turn to hold onto Daddy and let him know we love him. He's sleeping right now, not like when he takes a nap. This is the kind of sleep Snow White and Sleeping Beauty slept. So when we go into his room, we need to let him know how much we love. We need to tell him, Can you two do that?"

"Yes, Mommy," they both said.

* * *

_Winter 2009_

_Emily Prentiss' Brownstone_

_Later That Morning_

A friend of Emily's told her you can always start the day over again. She was testing this theory at the moment, since she and Spencer were back in bed. She managed to steer him back into her bedroom, and get his clothes off of him. She wasn't certain, but it was possible the sex was even better this morning than it was last night.

In any event, they were now both snuggled in the afterglow and this was how she had wanted to wake up this morning. To look at him, you wouldn't think that he would make such a good pillow. However, while he didn't have a lot of padding to him, his chest made the perfect spot to lay her head. He would probably say it was because he could hear the beating of his heart that calmed her. At the moment, she didn't care about scientific explanations. She was just enjoying being here, her head on his chest while one delicate hand stroked her hair.

"Em."

"Yeah?"

"Do you realize you're purring?"

"Really? " One of her hands started stroking his cheek. "I wonder why. Maybe it's you."

"No, I'm not purring."

She pinched his cheek hard, and he cried out in pain.

"That's what you get for being a smart-ass. I'm enjoying the afterglow. Don't spoil the moment." Her hand went back to stroking his cheek again. "You are the only man who has ever gotten me to purr. I don't want this to end."

"This morning? Or me and you?"

"Both. But if this morning has to end, promise me we won't."

"End? Emily, I promise I will be around as long as you want me."

"I'm holding you to that Spencer Reid."

* * *

_Present Day_

_Right outside Spencer Reid's Hospital Room_

Standing outside Spencer's hospital room, Samantha and Diane were crying. This wasn't supposed to happen. Daddy wasn't supposed to be laying in a hospital bed fighting for his life. He wasn't supposed to get shot. But it happened. Daddy got shot. There he was, fighting for his life. The whole team was there, Uncle Dave, Uncle Aaron, Aunt JJ, Aunt Penelope, and Uncle Derek.

Emily looked at her daughters. "Hey, you two listen to me. We've got to dry our eyes before we go in there. We all know how brave your father is. Right now, _we_ need to be just as brave. I know it's a hard thing I'm asking, but we have to do this. Okay?"

The girls nodded. Emily dabbed at their eyes, drying their tears. When she was satisfied that all three of them were relatively tear-free she said," Okay, let's go in there and tell him how much we love him."

Sam and Diane nodded, and they followed their mother in to the room.

The gathered around the bed. He looked so still, like Snow White inside her coffin of glass. Emily moved chairs near the bed so the girls could climb up and look their father in the face.

"Spencer," Emily said, "I'm back and the girls are here. I told them what happened next. How you found me when I was so sad. They know their father is brave and what he will do for someone he loves."

"Daddy," Samantha said, "Mommy said you fought another monster today. Wake up a and tell us about it. Daddy, Mommy told us we're supposed to be brave, but I don't want to be brave. I want you to wake up and tell us …anything. Please Daddy!"

Diane kissed him on the cheek. "Daddy, you're scaring Mommy and Sam. I know you always say rest help you heal. But we're just a little scared right now." She looked at her mother. "We love you Daddy. Wake up soon."

The girls stayed in there for a few minutes before JJ came in. "Hey, do the girls need a snack? Or lunch?"

"Yes, thank you JJ." Emily's voice was very quiet.

The girls protested, but Emily said," Go on with Aunt JJ. You can come back and see him when you're done."

After the girls had gone, Emily sat down next to him, and held his hand. "They're so brave Spencer. You're scaring all of us." She kissed his hand. "You need to wake up Spencer. I'm not ready to say goodbye yet. You need to stick around and see your son born. You have to give away your daughters at their weddings." She paused again. " _I_ need you. Do you understand me? "

Then Emily Prentiss-Reid broke down, crying uncontrollably over the motionless form of her husband. As she was crying, she felt a delicate hand start to stroke her hair. Then a voice, Spencer's voice, said," It's all right Em. I'm not going anywhere. Not anytime soon, anyway."


	9. As Reid Lay Dying

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Episodes Referenced: "52 Pickup", "Paradise", "The Instincts", "Memoriam"

_Present Day_

_Reid's Hospital Room_

Emily lifted her head, almost not daring to believe that Spencer was OK. She looked into his eyes, and was relieved to see they were open. He spoke again, "It's all right Emily. I'm fine. Well, aside from being shot. All in all, I'd have to say I screwed up."

"When? This morning?"

"No. Last night. I should have gone bed. You were right, I was just…I am actually awake, right? I'm not still dreaming, right?"

"Did you dream? While you were unconscious?"

"Well, I don't think I actually entered REM state of sleep, so technically it wouldn't be considered dreaming.""

"Now I know you're OK. Yes, you're awake. You're also very lucky, because if you hadn't just been shot and I wasn't on bed rest, I'd kick you're ass right now. You scared me and the girls."

"It wasn't much fun for me either."

"You are not charming your way out of this one, Spencer."

" I wasn't trying to, not really. Let me just tell you what happened right after I got shot."

"How about before?"

"I think that's less important right now."

Emily's eyes flashing angrily for a moment, then she relented. "Okay. What's the first thing you remember after you got shot?"

"Believe it or not, I was back in my study. Like I was early this morning. In fact, at first I thought it was this morning."

* * *

The couch in Spencer's study wasn't as comfortable as the bed. As far as couches go, it was fine. It wasn't going to make his back hurt but nothing was ever as comfortable as laying next to his wife. So why didn't he just go to the bedroom? As he lay on the couch, having woken up for the third time that night, he wondered that. What he didn't realize was he was asking the question out loud.

"Why am I staying in here? Am I crazy?"

"I was wondering the same thing Spencer. And as we both know, I have experience with crazy."

Spencer did not want to look at the person speaking. He didn't want to acknowledge what it meant that she was here.

"You can ignore me if you want to Spencer, but you know I'm not going to go away."

"What are you doing here Mom?"

"I don't know, it's your mind. You tell me."

"I'm dreaming again."

"Except we both know this isn't a dream, not in the strictest sense of the word. The better question is why you insist on being here instead of laying next to your wife. What is so important that you need to be here? Some ridiculous project from work?"

"It's the book I'm working on, "The Motivations and Methodology of Female Serial Killers".

"I really don't think that's a good topic for you to research Spencer."

"Mom, I work at the BAU. I'm an FBI agent. I'm not going to do close textual analysis of the works of Chaucer, I'm just not."

"Actually, I think a study of why good people participate in self-flagellation would give you some useful insight right now. You really should go to the bedroom right now. Or maybe you're in a hurry to go get shot."

* * *

"So what do you think it means that your mother wanted you to come to bed," Emily asked.

"I don't think it was Mom so much as a part of me that knew that's what I should do. Or rather should have done. Anyway, I didn't give it too much thought. I was a little distracted, because I heard the shots again."

* * *

BAM! BAM! BAM!

Reid heard the shots, but he wasn't in the BAU where he got shot. Instead, he was in the ambulance. Dave Rossi was sitting there with the EMT.

"Dave." Reid breathed the older agent's name.

"It's all right Reid. It's going to be fine."

"It's my fault. I didn't believe her. It's all my fault."

"Who? Who didn't you believe?"

"Emily. Get Emily. I need to talk to Emily."

"Hotch is calling her now. She'll be there."

"She told me she loved me, and I didn't believe her."

"I know. But you two worked it out. It's okay. It'll be okay."

Reid closed his eyes, as Rossi kept calling his name.

* * *

"Was the ambulance part a dream or was that what actually happened," Emily asked.

"That part was real. I guess Rossi was confused. You know what's funny? He knew you loved me before the rest of the team knew we were dating."

"And how did he know that?"

"You told him."

* * *

After he lost consciousness in the ambulance, Reid found himself in the hallway of the BAU. Rossi was calling his name again.

"Reid."

"What is it?"

"I think we need to talk."

"About what?"

"Prentiss."

Reid sighed. He remembered this now. It was after Emily told him she loved him, but long before JJ was back from maternity leave. Reid was still smarting from Emily's reaction right after the Viper case, not to mention Agent Todd saying Emily liked him.

"What about her," Reid asked.

"Well, I think something's bothering her."

"Why don't you talk to her about it."

"I think it might be you."

"Why?"

"You remember when we were in the Vegas? The night before she had a little too much to drink. She probably doesn't remember it, but she said she loved you."

"She told you she loved me?"

"Well, she told a karaoke bar full of people she loved you while she butchered a Jim Brickman song. Oh she didn't say Dr. Reid. She just said Spencer. I think you might want to talk to her."

"She already told me. And she's wrong."

"How can you be certain?" It wasn't Rossi's voice who asked the question. In fact, the voice came from behind Reid. He turned around to see himself face to face with his father.

"What are you doing here Dad? This isn't how it happened."

"What can I say Spencer, this is your mind. I stopped wondering how it worked a long time ago."

"When was that exactly Dad? Was it after Riley Jenkins died? Or after you left me and Mom?"

"Go ahead, attack me. But I'm not the one who got shot. Nor I am the one who stayed in my study instead of getting a good night's sleep next to my wife. That was you."

"No. You're the one who left a paranoid schizophrenic to take care of a 10 year by herself. And I'm done talking to you."

* * *

"So you stomped off like a little boy," Emily said. "Is that what you're telling me?"

Spencer sighed. "Is it possible for you refrain from making me feel like a horses ass until I'm better?"

"No. One of the fringe benefits of being your wife is I get to point out your faults whenever I like. You need me to do that, Spencer."

"Yeah. Maybe. Okay, yes perhaps that was a little childish. Then again, your father didn't leave you when you were 10, so there."

"Very intellectual rejoinder there Dr. Reid."

"Anyway, the next image I experienced was on the jet."

"When was this?"

"Before JJ went on maternity leave. We had just finished working a case in Nevada."

* * *

Reid needed to talk to Prentiss. He just couldn't let her little comment go unanswered. They were on a case in Nevada. The owner of a small motel was keeping couples captive, torturing them and making their deaths look like traffic accidents. They managed to save his latest victims, though they all knew the psychological damage would take years to get past. When it was all over, Prentiss had said "Remote motels go on the list. Of things to avoid."

Reid couldn't get that idea out of his head. So now they were on their way home, he felt he had to talk to her about it. So he sat down across from her, as she had once done to him, and said, "Were you serious back there?"

"About what?"

"About having a list of things to avoid."

"Yes. You really don't have one? After things we've seen, you don't have a list?"

"No. That list is an admission of defeat."

"Excuse me?"

"It's an admission of defeat. That list says you're going to let fear dictate how you will live."

"Don't we all do that anyway?"

"To a point, maybe. But that list… Just because one motel owner did this, doesn't mean remote motels are dangerous."

"I'm not sure those couples would agree."

"Again, one person doesn't represent all of them. And how many have stayed at remote hotels and had a perfectly wonderful time. I bet I could find some who say they had a magical time. I bet I could show yow something similar with everything on your list. This job's tough enough, without letting it make you give up on experiences that could otherwise enrich your life. Don't do it."

Emily smiled. "You really are quite passionate sometimes, Dr. Reid."

"I just wouldn't want you to give up on living fully, that's all."

"And I don't want you to stop living period."

"Not you too. Can't I just remember things with out it being about this morning and last night?"

"Like you're parents have already said, it's your mind. I suppose you want me to go away too."

"No. Never."

"And yet you didn't come to bed last night. Why? Are you really that ashamed about that one night?"

"No. I mean, I'm ashamed of it, but I'm more ashamed I didn't try to fix it sooner. It took Matthew Benton's death to move me to act. I should have done it sooner."

"Maybe. But don't you think, if it bothers you this much, you should talk to me about it? The real me, not the version you have conjured in you mind right now?"

"Maybe."

She shook her head. "There's no maybe about it. You know that. There is nothing we can't do if we work together. You promised, _we_ promised each other that's how we would live together. We said that's how we wanted to raise our family."

"I know. You're right."

"Just one more thing."

"What?"

"You're not allowed to die. I want you to understand that. I'm going to get the girls, but I want you to know that you are not allowed to die. Not now, not ever. When I'm on my death bed, maybe, _maybe_ I'll give you permission to die then. So, when I bring the girls back, you need to be awake. You _need_ to be okay."

Reid knew that was the actual Emily talking now. He must be out of surgery.

* * *

"You heard that?" Emily asked.

"It's not that unusual. I mean, many times people's dreams change depending on stimuli their unconscious brain is processing as they're in REM sleep. And you were talking right to me. I mean, that's why you were talking to me, to see if I would wake up."

"But you didn't wake just then."

"No, not yet."

"I remember that conversation. Did you know I came this close to asking you out then. When I got home I even had a dream about us joining the mile high club."

"Really?" Spencer asked. "What is your fascination with us doing that?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean you've mentioned having that particular fantasy several times ever since we started dating. You even tried to get me to do it on our honeymoon."

"It's something I've always wanted to try. I think you owe it to me after last night and this morning."

"You realize that what you're talking about is sex in a tight space, since that's usually done inside an airplane bathroom."

"We did it inside a supply closet, what's the difference?"

"It's a bathroom. Not a clean one either. And we both had sore backs for a week after we had sex in the supply closet."

"You going off topic."

"You're right there with me."

"So what happened next, since we both know you didn't wake up then?"

"I ended up at the BAU offices, like I was this morning."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

* * *

Reid regretted coming to work that morning. He regretted leaving the house early and he regretted napping his couch. Right then, he had substituted pretending to work on his book at home to pretending to work on case files. Then he heard Morgan say, "what's wrong kid?"

"Nothing."

"Who do you think you're fooling? C'mon it's me. What's wrong? Is it Emily? The girls?"

"No. Everyone's fine. I had trouble sleeping is all."

"Nightmares?"

"No, nothing like that. I was just a little worked up is all. It's not a big deal."

"Kid, are you worried Emily and the baby?"

"Maybe a little. I'm going to get to coffee, I'll be right back."

Reid got up and went to the break room. He filled up on coffee. As he was putting his usual large amount of sugar in there, he happened to see Agent Cooper walk by. One glance at Cooper, and he knew something was wrong. He dismissed it.

For two seconds.

The look in Cooper's eyes, Reid had seen it before in countless unsubs, right before they shot someone. Reid ran out of the break room and followed Cooper into the bullpen. He saw Cooper take out his gun and take aim at Anderson. Reid tackled him to the ground before  
Cooper pulled the trigger. The two of them wrestled for the gun, when it went off.

BAM. BAM. BAM.

Reid stood up with the gun in his hand, and three bullet holes in him.

"That wasn't meant for you," Cooper said.

Reid collapsed before he could think of anything to say.

* * *

"Is that what happened?" Emily asked.

"Yeah, that's what happened. I should have been smarter."

"You knew what he was going to do with one look."

"I waited two seconds. I could have done something better to stop him. I've talked people down before Emily. I've handled situations worse than that without getting shot."

"You aren't the one who should be recriminating himself. Cooper is. So, you remembered that and then you woke up."

"Not exactly."

* * *

After reliving being shot, Reid found himself in an interrogation room. He remembered the room. It was the same room he interrogated his father in during the Riley Jenkins case. Reid turned around to see his dad there.

"So, here we are again Spencer."

"I don't want to talk to right now."

"Well, I'm here so I think you actually do. You know, you keep saying you should have gone to bed and left the study. You say you shouldn't have gone in early to work. But the way things worked out, you stopped Cooper from hurting people. That's something isn't it?"

"That's something. But if I never see Emily or the girls again, it won't be enough."

"Then wake up."

"Just like that. Wisdom from father of the year."

"How long are going to pissed at me? How long are you going to blame me for everything?"

"I'm not blaming you."

"Really? Is that why you asked Emily if I every felt bad about what I did?"

"I was trying to understand if I still might…" Reid couldn't make himself say the words.

"You're afraid you might abandon them? Well you did."

"I did not."

"You hid in the study. You left early for work. And you got shot."

"I am not _you_. I am _not_!"

" _I'm_ not me. I'm a version of me that lives in your head. Cast as all things bad. You know what would be great? If when you're pissed at William Reid, you call him. Try to work things out with the real him. But go ahead, let's go round and round in here instead. Because we all know that will do Emily and the girls, plus Matthew, a world of good."

At that moment, Spencer heard something over the PA system in the interrogation room.

"You need to wake up Spencer. " It was Emily's voice.

Reid ran out of the interrogation room, trying to find the sound of the voice. The hallway he was in was crowded with unsubs and FBI agents. But he kept hearing Emily's voice.

"I'm not ready to say goodbye yet. You need to stick around and see your son born. You have to give away your daughters at their weddings."

Suddenly he was in a hospital bed, trying to open his eyes when he heard her say," _I_ need you. Do you understand me? " Then she was crying.

* * *

"And then I was awake," Spencer said.

Two tears started to trickle down Emily's cheeks. "Now I'm really pissed at you."

"Why?"

"Because you're making it hard for me to be mad at you."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't talk to you about what was bothering me last night. I should have just gone to bed."

"Yes, you should have. But you didn't, and it's over. Are you really afraid you're going to abandon us?"

"Sometimes."

She smiled and shook her head. "For a genius, you're pretty stupid sometimes."

"What do you mean?"

"You may go off to be by yourself sometimes, but you would never, ever, leave us. We all know that. There is one thing you had right while you were dreaming."

"What's that?"

"You should talk to your father about some of this."

"When I'm not hooked up to a bunch of tubes."

"It might be sooner."

"What do you mean."

"I called him."

"Who?"

"Your father. I told him in no uncertain terms he needed to come here right now."

"Why?"

"I was assuming you were going to recover, and I didn't want whatever was bothering you last night to rear it's head again."

"And you think Dad's going to fix it?"

"I think you having a very honest talk with your father is going to help you. That's what I want, because that's what you need.


	10. Hospital Stories

_Present Day_

_Hospital waiting area_

While JJ took the girls to the cafeteria and Emily was in with Spencer, the remaining members of the team were sitting and waiting. Penelope Garcia looked speculatively at the door to that lead to Reid's room.

"Do you think Reid's awake?" she said.

"I don't hear Emily yelling," Morgan said," so no."

"You think she'll yell?" Hotch asked.

"That's right, " Rossi said," you weren't awake yet. When he got shot in the knee. You were still recovering from Foyet's attack."

"She yelled?"

"Did she ever," Morgan said. "I thought she was going to kill Reid. Of course, that's how we knew they were dating. Still, it was a sight to see."

A few minutes later, JJ came by with the girls.

"C'mon Aunt JJ," Sam said. "We need to go see Daddy."

"In a minute," JJ said,"Let's give Mommy sometime alone with him."

Suddenly a shout rang out through the hospital.

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME!" It was Reid. Not Emily yelling, it was Spencer Reid yelling louder than anyone outside of his family ever heard him yelling.

Everyone looked at each other in a mix of shock and horror. Everyone except for Samantha and Diane who cried out with sheer joy in their voices," Daddy!" They ran to his room, with the rest of the team trailing behind them.

* * *

_Fall 2009_

_Hospital Room_

Emily finally made it to Spencer's room. She meant to see him earlier, she wanted to see him earlier. The problem is that Hotch needed her first. The bigger problem, however, is that the two of them were still keeping their relationship below the radar. Things were getting serious fast, and they were weren't quite certain how to tell people.

When she entered his room, Spencer was getting dressed. A pair of crutches were leaning against the wall.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here sooner," she said.

"What would have done?" he asked. "Hotch needed you. I'm fine. They told me I can leave."

"You got shot in the knee and you're okay?"

"I'll be on crutches for a few weeks, but I'll be fine."

"You may want to hold off leaving the hospital, just yet."

"Why?"

"Because I'm about to beat you to death with those crutches."

"I don't understand."

"We talked about this. We talked about being careful."

"I was."

"You got in the knee!" she screamed.

"You might want to lower your voice."

"You might want to start taking me seriously!"

"I take you very seriously."

"Then why weren't you more careful today?" her glare bordered on being murderous.

"I was as careful as I could be. I tried to talk him down, but I couldn't. I protected the doctor and I took down the subject. Sometimes we can't avoid getting hurt. I would think you of all people would understand that."

"It's different."

"Why?"

"Because I need you."

"That's nice to hear."

"No, Spencer. _Hotch_ is badly injured. _Hotch_ almost died. _We_ are under attack, and _I_ need you in one piece. _You_ can't do this anymore. _You_ have got to be careful. You're supposed to be a genius."

"I am a genius."

"Then use your genius to not get hurt any more. Do you hear me? _No_ more injuries of any kind. Period."

"What the hell's going on on?" Emily and Reid turned to see Derek Morgan looking bewildered. "I heard Emily yelling."

"It's no big deal, Derek," Spencer said.

"No big deal?" Emily almost yelled it. "This is you taking me seriously? You …you …"

Derek's eyes widened as he tried to figure what was going on. "What's going on here?"

"My girlfriend here is mad at me because I got shot. It's fine. Don't worry about it Derek."

"Girlfriend?" Morgan was trying to figure out if Reid was serious. He was joking, wasn't he?

Emily looked at Reid. Did he realize what he just said? When their eyes met, she realized he did. She turned back towards Derek Morgan and said," Yes, his girlfriend. He is off the market and I have him. Now go away so I can beat him to death with his crutches."

"Why?'

"Because he's an idiot!" she snapped.

* * *

_Present Day_

_Reid's Hospital Room_

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME!" Reid bellowed again.

The first time he yelled, it caught Emily off guard. This time, she just sighed. She knew he was going to have a reaction, she just didn't think it would be this loud.

"About what?"

"You called my father? You called him and told him to get here?"

"Yeah. And given what was going through your head, I think I was right to do it. And you need to lower your voice."

"You're going to give a lecture on being calm? You're the one who usually yells at me when I get shot."

"One time. I did that one time. Any minute now, your daughters are going to walk through the door, so you need to get a hold of yourself."

As if on cue, Samantha and Diane walked through and exclaimed," Daddy!" They climbed on the bed with him, and both of them started talking a mile a minute. The rest of the BAU came in the room a few minutes later.

"What's wrong?" JJ asked.

"It's fine," Emily said. "He's awake. I gave him some news that shocked him and he yelled."

"He yells?" JJ was surprised.

"Oh, you have no idea."

As the BAU looked on, Reid listened to his daughter talk on and on, nodding politely with a smile on his face. Then he held up his hand, and said, "alright girls, I'm fine. I need to you to be quiet for a minute, all right?"

The girls got quiet, and then Reid looked at the team. "I'm okay. Everything is fine. I appreciate everyone's concern, but I need a few minutes alone with Emily. In the meantime, I think there are two girls who need to start working on homework."

"But Dad...' his daughters protested.

"Now," he said. "I'll be here when you're done. I'm sure you can find a spot to work in the waiting room. JJ, would you mind?"

"Not at all Spence." JJ shepherded the girls , and the rest of the team, back out into the waiting room.

After they left the room Emily looked at Spencer again. "So, are you calm now?"

"A little. I'm sorry I yelled."

"I'm not."

"What?"

"I'm not sorry you yelled. I would rather that you express yourself than bottle it up. So, go ahead express yourself. You might want watch you're volume a little bit, is all."

"Fine. Why don't we call Dad?"

"Really?"

"Just want to know if he's coming. If he is, we'll deal it. But you realize he might not be coming."

"Sure he is."

"Just because you told him to? I hate to break it you, but not everyone does what you tell them you. Only me and the girls feel that obligation."

"Yet the three of don't always do what I tell you to do. Besides, I'm betting that William Reid will do what a pissed off pregnant woman tells him to do, especially if she's his daughter-in-law. But by all means, let's call him and confirm details."


	11. Phone Calls

_Present Day_

_William Reid's office_

Several hours after Emily called her father-in-law, her words still rang in his ears.

"Spencer's been shot. I don't know if he will make it. Do you why he got shot? Because he went into work early. Because something's been bothering him. You. He's afraid he's not a good father. He's afraid he will leave his family like you did. There is something you two need to work out. Right now, it's possible that our girls and his son won't have a father. So you need to get your happy ass down here. I don't care what you have going on right now, if you don't get on a plane and come here to help your son, I am going to have you arrested and brought here, do you understand me?"

William Reid recognized anger and frustration when he heard it. He also knew Emily was getting close to giving birth. He thought about what he was going to for a few minutes. It took him only one minute to decide what he had to do, the rest was to convince himself he could pull it off. He immediately started making calls.

The first was to the partners at his law firm. The second was to the Bennington Sanitarium.

A few hours later, Diana Reid was reading in the common room at Bennington Sanitarium. She heard footsteps and looked up to see her ex-husband standing there. She immediately knew something was wrong.

"What are doing here?" she asked.

William sat down across from her. "How are you feeling today?" he asked her in the gentlest tone he could muster.

"What's wrong?" her voice got tight and the stress in her voice was evident.

"Diana, you need to be calm. If you don't stay calm, the orderlies will be in here and I won't be able to stop them. How are you feeling?"

She glared at him, then closed her eyes and let out a sigh. She managed opened her eyes and said," I'm as calm a I can be when I know you have bad news. So tell me, what's wrong?"

"Spencer's been shot. Emily called me, and she's upset. She says Spencer's been upset and she wants me to go down there. I don't know how bad it is, but if she's calling me for help, things can't be good."

"No, I guess not. Are you going?"

"Yes."

Diana reached over and very gently took his hand. "It will be all right, William."

"Don't worry about me. I'm not the one who got shot and I'm not the one who's pregnant."

"No, you're just the one going to spend time with his son who's still mad at him. You know that Spencer is going to resent you being there. And Emily's not likely to make you feel welcome either."

"Should I expect anything else?"

"You should take me with you."

"No."

"The girls will love it, and Spencer will be more relaxed."

"He will be worried about your well being, so will Emily. It's a bad idea, and it's not going to happen."

"William…"

"You're staying."

"So why did you come here?"

"To tell you what was happening. I'll call you when I know something."

"Fine." The look she gave him communicated it was anything but fine.

Before he had a chance to say something else, his cell phone rang.

"You didn't turn it off?" she asked in an annoyed tone.

"It might be Emily with an update." He looked at the phone for a moment. "Hello?"

"Dad?" It was Spencer.

"Spencer! How are you? Emily said you were shot."

"I was. I'm fine. I know that Emily called you and said we needed you to come down, but it's really not necessary."

William heard Emily in the back ground say, "Oh no you don't, Spencer Reid!" in her irritated tone.

"Spencer, are you being discharged?" his father asked.

"Probably not tonight."

"Then I'll go ahead and plan to fly out."

"Dad, you don't need to do this."

"I think Emily would disagree. I gather she thinks we need to talk. Spencer, I'm actually here with your mother, I'm going to let her talk." He handed the phone to Diana. "He says he's fine, go ahead and talk to him."

Diana took the phone from him with a dubious look on her face. "Spencer? Is that you?"

"Hi Mom," he said. "I'm fine."

"Of course you are. Were you on another case?"

"Not exactly. It's not really important. Just tell Dad he doesn't need to come down."

"Is Emily right there?"

"Yes." He was surprised she was asking about Emily.

"Put her on please."

She heard him say," She wants to talk to you?"

Diana heard Emily on the phone. "Hello? Diana?"

"How is he? Is he fine?"

"We'll see. He's alert and he's himself. He's not ready to get out of bed yet, but the doctors have to take a look at him first."

"Why did you call William? Was it because Spencer was shot? Or is something bothering him?"

"He's…struggling with something significant, and I think he needs to have a face-to-face talk with his father about it."

"We will both be there."

"Both of you?"

"Just make sure my son doesn't try to leave the hospital before the doctor's say he should, and we'll be there."

"The doctors will let you leave?"

"For a family emergency? Sure. We'll call you when we're on the way." She hung up.

"No, Diana." William said.

"Yes."

"No."

"William, it's time. And you know it too."

William sighed. "I'll go talk to the doctors."

* * *

Emily hung up the phone and smiled just a little triumphantly at her husband. "Well, it appears we're going to have two guests."

"What?"

"Despite your efforts, you father is coming. And so is your mother."

"The doctors won't let her leave."

"Spencer, if you think Diana Reid is going to let a minor thing like doctors keep her from coming, you have misjudged your mother. I think she's bound and determined to make sure you're okay, not to mention she probably wants to be here when her grandson is born."


	12. First Comes Love, Then Comes Marriage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Episodes referenced: "100", "Slave of Duty"

_Fall 2009_

_Emily Prentiss's Brownstone_

It had been a rough few days for them. It had started when Foyet killed Haley. Then, they all had to endure yet another Strauss witch-hunt, as if Hotch hadn't suffered enough. Then, at Haley's funeral, the team had to go on a case. When they came back, they were all emotionally drained.

Over the past several months, Spencer and Emily had fallen into a pattern of alternating who's apartment then spent the night in. This time, it was Emily's. When they there, they dropped their go bags, and collapsed onto the couch. They were silent for a while, then Spencer broke the silence.

"It makes you think, doesn't it?" he said.

"What does?"

"Foyet. Haley. Even the case. I mean, those women had plans, and one disturbed man unraveled them. You never know what's going to happen next."

"Yeah. So I guess you have to make each moment count, huh?"

"That's not good enough."

"What do you mean?"

"It's not enough to make every moment count. You have to make things happen, because you never know what will happen. We get complacent. We think we can plan for what happens next, but you can never really be sure, can you?"

Emily's eyes narrowed. "What are you leading up to?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're leading up to something. Whatever it is, get to it. I'm too tired for something long and drawn out."

"Then I won't make you wait." He stood up, and moved so he was right in front of her. Then he kneeled on his good knee.

"What are you doing?"

He fumbled in his pocket, then he took a small box out of his jacket pocket. "Emily, I don't want to waste anymore time. Will you marry me?" He opened the box to reveal a ring with a small diamond in it.

She was so tired, it took her a moment to realize what was happening.

"Are sure Spencer? I mean, we don't have to rush, really. I mean…"

"We don't know how much time we have. And even if we do have all the time in the world, I'm sure. I'm sure I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. And I'm sure I want to marry you. So, will you marry me?"

Emily sighed contently. She leaned over and brought him to her, and kissed him on the mouth. When their lips parted she said," Yes. Of course yes."

* * *

_Present Day_

_Las Vegas airport_

William Reid looked at his wife. He knew this was going to be hard. Diana was terrified of flying. She was being brave, but he knew that look in her eyes. He hated that look, she looked like a frightened rabbit. That wasn't who she was.

Making the arrangements with the doctors was easy. Then again, they had been working on this for a few months now. This was just moving the time table up.

"Are you sure you want to do this Di?" he asked softly. "We can take a train, it'll take a little longer, but it will be okay. Emily will understand."

She smiled. "I'll be fine. Just …" she almost said something, then thought better of it," I'll be fine. I think we should tell them everything when we get there, though."

"Not all at once. A little at a time. They're going through enough. Promise me Diana."

She nodded.

"Diana! Look me in the eye and promise me we'll go slow. Promise?"

She sighed. "Fine. I promise."

He rubbed her should encouragingly, "I'm sorry. I know you want to tell them. I just don't want it to be too much to soon, is all."

"I know." She placed her hand over his. "Why don't you call Emily and let her know we'll be there."

"Sure." He dialed the phone.

* * *

_Present Day_

_Reid-Prentiss household_

Emily was talking on the phone with her father-in-law. "Are you sure you don't want me to pick you up?" she asked.

"No, we'll get a rental car. I know the way there. You rest. Get the girls in bed. Remember, we're coming to help, not be a burden."

"How did you get the doctors to let her go?"

"She's been doing better. Anyway, she's going to call Dr. Norman everyday. Plus she has an appointment with a colleague of Dr. Norman's who has offices near you. We've been working on this for a while. She really wanted to be there to see Matthew born. Plus, she misses the girls."

"They'll be excited to see her. William, I'm sorry about how I talked to you this morning."

"Don't be. I wasn't a good father to Spencer. We all know that. And if something's bothering, I'll everything I can to help. You do realize, that won't much. This is one of those things he has to work out himself."

"I know. But I think you two are overdue for a frank talk about this."

"Maybe. Anyway, we'll be there in a few hours. I'll call when we're on the road."

Putting the girls to bed was particularly challenging that night, since they wanted to be up when Grandpa and Nana Reid got there.

"They will be here when you wake up, and that will have to do."

"But Mama," they said," we never get to see them."

"But you will in the morning. In the meantime, you need to sleep." She looked at them with a sly gleam in her eye," So, should I read you a story or tell you about how you're father and I got married?"

"Oh, yes, tell us about you and Daddy getting married," Samantha exclaimed.

"All right, settle down and I will. It started, with the Foyet monster. Do you remember him?"

"He killed Jack's mother," Diane said.

"That's true. And after he did, after Uncle Aaron killed him, we all mourned Haley's passing. At her funeral, we all had to go on an adventure. A bad man was killing women, and there was no one else to send. After we caught him, after we got home, you father asked me to marry him."

"He got down on one knee and he asked me to marry him. To tell you the truth, I wasn't expecting it. I almost didn't know what to say, then I remembered how much I loved him, how much he come to mean to me. Then I said yes. Then came the next thing we had to do. We had to tell the team. Starting with your Uncle Aaron."

* * *

_Fall 2009_

_Hotch's Office_

It was Aaron's Hotchner's first day back as the team leader. He and Morgan were having a talk in his office, and Morgan was happy to let Hotch come back as the team leader.

"I told you Hotch, this was temporary."

"You've done better than anyone expected. Don't be surprised if some doors open for you now."

"They may open, but I don't see myself walking through them."

"Give them some thought before you turn them down. That's all I ask."

There was a knock on the door. The two men looked up to see Spencer Reid and Emily Prentiss standing there.

"Are we interrupting anything?" Emily said with a smile.

"Because we can come back." Reid said.

"No, I was just welcoming Hotch back to his real role on the team," Morgan said. "You two need something?"

"Well, we need talk to our boss, because something has come up," Emily said.

"I'll talk to you guys later," Morgan said and as walked out the office, shutting the door behind him.

"Have a seat," Hotch said. After they sat down, Hotch asked," What is it?"

"Well, I guess you know that Emily and I have been dating."

"Yeah, we all know."

"Well, there's been a change. I mean, I feel the way I've always felt about her, but our condition has changed."

Hotch's eyes narrowed in thought as he looked at the two of them.

"We're engaged," Emily said.

"Engaged?" Hotch asked.

She nodded. "He asked and I said yes."

"Are you sure? I mean, if you are I'm happy for you. I just want the two of to …"

"We sure," Reid said. "We're very sure. We know this could cause some problems, but …if one of us has to transfer…we'll do whatever we have to do."

"You're sure?" Hotch asked.

"Very sure." Emily said.

"I'll talk to Strauss.


	13. The Wedding Adventure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Episode referenced: "Retaliation"

_Present Day_

_The Reid-Prentiss House_

_Bedtime_

"Mommy, why did you need to tell Uncle Aaron first? About you and Daddy getting married?" Diane asked.

"Because sweetie," Emily said," it isn't something we're supposed to do."

"What are you talking about?" Samantha asked.

"The FBI doesn't like us to get too intimately involved with the people we work with. The truth is, your father I were bending the rules, and we figured our days of working together were over."

"But they weren't. You still go on adventures together." Samantha said.

"That's right. All that's because of your Uncle Aaron."

* * *

_Fall 2009_

_Section Chief Erin Strauss's Office_

"They're going to get married? " Chief Strauss asked. "To each other?"

"They've been seeing each other for a few months, ma'am."

"How can you let this happen, Aaron?"

"It never interfered with their work and they kept it very low-key. Truthfully, we barely noticed it."

"Well, one of them will have to leave the team."

"No ma'am."

"Excuse me?"

"I need them. Both of them."

"Aaron, this isn't a preference. This isn't something that is up for debate."

'I need my team together ma'am. The loss of even one would be catastrophic to us. It's the reason I stepped aside so Morgan could take over. We're a good team doing good work. Any personnel changes hurt us. I need them both to stay right where they are."

"Aaron, the rules on fraternization are clear."

"The rules exist to prevent issues regarding morale and unit cohesion. Both would be decimated if either Reid or Prentiss left the team."

Erin Strauss knew she would have issues with Aaron Hotchner eventually. She just didn't expect it so soon after he came back, and certainly not over something like this.

"Aaron, you expect me to ignore policy that is this clear?"

"To preserve a team that consistently does excellent work? Of course I do. Even you have to admit we have done outstanding work. When roles changed, the team still functioned at peak performance. That wasn't an accident. That demonstrates the strength of the team. Do you really want to mess with that?"

"Aaron, I am sorry if following policy will make your team unhappy, but this is what we need to do."

"No. You choose to do it. Just like you chose to put us under scrutiny because of Foyet. Just like you did when Gideon left and you almost chased off Agent Prentiss while you tried to get rid of me."

"Aaron, after the deal I arranged for you, a deal you would have done well to accept, you dare to talk to me like this?"

"Yes ma'am. I do. Because I'm right, and you know it. I won't just roll over on this. If I have to take this to the director, I will. Is that what you want?"

Strauss's eyes widened in surprise. Was he really looking for a fight over this? She needed time to convince the director Hotchner was a problem. If Hotchner talked to the director now, she knew the director would listen to Hotchner. The director was part of a growing number of people who thought Hotchner was a hero. Especially since he had a choice for full retirement and he chose to stay. She needed a way to Hotchner's judgement was clouded and erroneous.

"I'll give you a month. Prove to me that their relationship won't get in the way of their jobs, and I'll allow it."

"That's all I ask ma'am."

Hotch told them they had a month to demonstrate they could remain professional on the job. He knew Strauss was setting a trap, but he had faith in Reid and Prentiss.

* * *

_Present Day_

_The Reid-Prentiss House_

_Bedtime_

"So," Emily said," Uncle Aaron convinced Chief Strauss to let us work together, at least for a little while longer. We just had to prove we be as good at fighting the monsters as we ever were. What we didn't know, is how soon we were going to prove it."

Emily smiled mischievously, " and believe in or not girls, we're getting to the part of the story where you two play a role."

"We do?" they both said in unison, totally surprised.

"Oh yes. In fact, you two had a lot to do with what happened next. You two, and a monster."

"Which monster?"

"I don't remember his name. Only that he forced a good man to rescue him from us. In the process, however, I go badly hurt. They took me to the hospital, and you know what? Your father kept working to find the monster."

"Daddy?" they were shocked.

"Daddy knew I was ok. More importantly, he knew he had to act a certain way, to show Strauss we were still the some team we always were. I was fine and was back on the case. We found the monster, and everything was fine."

"But how did we play a role?" Samantha asked imploringly.

"Well, once we got home, Daddy insisted I go to the doctor and get a more through exam. I went in to the hospital, and the doctors poked and prodded and did all kinds of scans. Then we waited for the results."

* * *

_Fall 2009_

_Doctor's office_

Emily and Spencer waited in the doctor's office. After a full day of every kind of test the doctors could think of to run, mostly to placate Spencer, the two of them sat waiting on the results.

"You're overacting, "Emily said. "You do know that, right?"

"This from the woman who threatened to beat me to death when I got shot."

"After you refused medical treatment."

"I didn't refuse, I just made sure someone who needed it more got it first. Some people would call that heroic."

"Like someone who was wounded on the job, and got right back to it as soon as possible?"

"And probably browbeat the doctors into overlooking something?"

"Spencer, …" but whatever she was going to say got interrupted by the doctor walking in at that moment.

"Well, the good news is our initial diagnosis is correct. Emily's in good shape. She didn't suffer a concussion and there are no broken bones or sprains."

"I told you Spencer."

"It's better to be sure," Spencer said.

"And you both relax, the baby's fine."

They looked at each other for a moment in stunned silence.

"The baby?" Spencer said.

"You didn't know? Emily here is about four weeks pregnant?"

"Pregnant?" Emily was shocked. "I mean, I know my period's late but that's not unusual for me."

"Well, then, congratulations, you're pregnant." The doctor said. For a while, the engaged couple (and parents to-be) didn't know what to do.

* * *

"That was us?" Samantha asked.

"That was you. We didn't know you would be twins until later. That really decided us. We had talked about dates, but we were thinking about a year down the road. Instead, we got married about six weeks later. It was a small ceremony, with some select friends and family. The best present, though, was from a very special guest. The Director of the FBI. Strauss's boss. He gave such a nice toast at the reception. And he promised, we wouldn't be separated. He had absolute faith in us, and we kept going on adventures."

"Yeahhh." The girls cheered.

"Now," Emily said," it's time for two small girls to go to sleep. When you wake up, Nana and Grandpa Reid will be here."

The girls went to sleep without any fuss, dreaming of their parents catching monsters and making Strauss squirm with irritation.


	14. Nana Talks to Mommy

_Present Day_

_The Reid-Prentiss Household_

_The Next Morning_

Just like Emily promised, Grandpa and Nana Reid were there when the girls got up. The girls were excited, and started asking Nana a thousand questions. It took both Emily and William a little while to get the girls focused, dressed and out the door for school.

After the girls were gone, the adults had breakfast, and William supervised Diana taking her medication. He took the rental to see Spencer at the hospital. Right before he left, though, he said," Diana, don't forget to call Dr. Norman. He's expecting your call."

"I'll remember. Go talk with Spencer."

After he left, she looked at Emily and said," Emily, I think it's time we had a talk, about Spencer and William."

"Oh?" Emily had always found Diana a little hard to read. She had always assumed that Diana shared Spencer's anger towards William for leaving. Right now, however, she got the feeling Diana had some compassion for William. The truth was Diana's tone of voice was one Emily often had, when she was explaining Spencer to people.

"You wanted Will to come here, because of something was bothering Spencer. You want him to talk to Spencer."

"Don't you think it's about time the two of them talk about it?" Emily asked Diana.

"About what?"

"Diana, you know what. He puts on a brave face, but Spencer is still profoundly upset by his father abandoning you two."

"He didn't."

"Yes he did."

"No, Emily, he didn't."

Emily sighed. It was like this with Diana sometimes. She didn't know where she was or what had happened. There was a time when Diana thought Emily was a grad student of hers Spencer had a crush on.

"Diana, William left you two when Spencer was 10."

"He stopped living with us, that's true, but he didn't abandon us. And if Spencer is upset, he should be upset at both of us, not just Will."

"Diana, it wasn't your fault."

"How do you know Emily?"

"Diana, William chose to leave you and his son."

"Emily, you know what Spencer _thinks_ he knows. You and I both know how extraordinary Spencer's mind is. But we also know how unreliable his memory is regarding deeply emotional times."

"What are you saying?"

"I think it's time you know about what happened. I want William to tell Spencer, but I don't think he will."

"Of course not. Why would he want to explain why he left?"

"He's afraid of doing more damage."

"What more damage could he do?"

"Has Spencer ever talked to you about the night the girls were born?"

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"I know what happened that night. I know how bad things got. Your mother was there. So was William. He was a business trip, and called about getting together with you two. You were on your way to the hospital though, because you couldn't feel them kick."

"What's your point?"

"They did an emergency C-section on you. After the girls were born, you developed an infection. Spencer was afraid you were going to die."

"I know that." It was almost a whisper. They didn't talk about that night, but she knew how bad it was. She knew how scared Spencer got that night. It was one story she had no intention of telling the girls for a long time.

"Did you know he broke down in the waiting room?"

"Again, Diana, why does this matter?"

"Because, when he thought you might die, he was afraid of being a father. And that's when William told Spencer the truth."

"What are you talking about? What truth?"

"Spencer told you I guess, that before he left William and I fought all the time. Did he tell you what we fought about?"

"It was about your health. I guess it was getting too much for William to deal with every day."

"Not exactly. He wanted to commit me, like Spencer did. Only I wouldn't let him."

Emily considered that for a minute. "Why didn't he? I mean, Spencer had no trouble committing you. And William's a lawyer, so he would have had an easier time doing it. If that's what he wanted to do."

"Except he's my husband, and I was holding him to two promises he made the day Spencer was born."

"Promises?"

"I made him promise not to ever take Spencer away from me and not to put me in a hospital unless I consent."

"Why did he make that promise?"

"New fathers make promises, especially when they love their wife. I told you, he didn't abandon us. I told him to leave. He couldn't stand what was happening to me. He couldn't stand that I couldn't see I needed to be in a hospital. And he couldn't break his promise to me. I told him if he wouldn't stop talking about hospitals, he had to leave. So he left."

"Diana, that doesn't make sense."

"It did to us. Aren't there things that make sense to you and Spencer that don't make sense to any one else?"

The two women sat in silence for a while. Diana broke the silence. "I have to call Dr. Norman for our daily phone session. But I want you to read these, you need to read these." Diana took some letters out of her journal and placed them in front of Emily. Then she walked into the kitchen to use the phone.

Emily read the first one. Looking at the date, it would have been a few weeks after William had left. It read:

_Diana,_

_It's been only a few weeks since I've seen you and I feel empty inside. I don't think anyone realizes it, but you would if you saw me._

_I don't regret the promises I made or keeping them. I only regret the consequence. Say the word or come see me and I will come. But I still feel you need help. More help than I can give. More help than just doctors appointments can give._

_You know I'm right. Someday, I hope you call or write or come and say you're ready. Until then, I will respect your wishes. I have already made sure you and Spencer will be taken care of until then._

_I only ask one thing of you right now, don't tell Spencer about the promises. Don't explain it to him. I know he's a wonder, but he's not ready to understand this. Let him a child. We both know how extraordinary he is, but let him a boy for right now. He doesn't need to understand this. I know he will come to hate me for a while, but if it means he can be a boy for a while, I will bear it._

_I think you owe me at least that much._

Emily put the letter down. She had to think about this for a while.


	15. Father and Son

_Present Day_

_Reid's Hospital Room_

"Why are you here, Dad?" Spencer asked. His father was sitting in the chair next to his bed.

"Emily said you need to talk to me."

"She's wrong. I'm fine. I don't need you." Spencer had decided he didn't need this. Not now, and not ever.

"Okay, so she's wrong. Why does she think you and I need to talk?"

"Because she wants everything to be just fine. Plus, she doesn't like to not be at work. I'm actually surprised she hasn't asked about getting pregnancy induced."

"So she's worried for no reason?"

"Why do you care?"

"I'm your father."

"Is that why you left?"

William sighed. He could tell Spencer, right here and right now. He could, but should he?

"Spencer, do you remember the night the girls were born?"

"I have an eidetic memory, Dad, of course I remember."

"Eidetic doesn't mean perfect. You and I both know that. So tell me, do you remember that night?"

"What does it matter?"

What William wanted to say was, it mattered what he could tell Spencer. He wanted to say, I told you the truth about our family on that night. I told you why I left, but I can't tell you again if you pushed it out of your mind. You need to remember it on your own.

William wanted to say all that and more to Spencer. Instead he said," It matters to me Spencer. I told you something I hoped you would remember. I understand if you don't."

"What am I supposed to remember?"

"It isn't important. You will remember when it's time."

"Or you can tell me now."

"No. It's better if you remember on your own."

"Don't you have anything better to do with your time?"

"Nope."

The two sat in silence for a few minutes. Spencer broke the silence. "How did you get the doctors to let Mom come here? It was hard to convince them to let her come out for the wedding."

"We've been working on this for a while. she really wanted to be here when Matthew's born."

"But that probably won't be for a few weeks at least. They're willing to let her be gone for that long?"

"As long as she call everyday and sees a colleague of Dr. Norman's out here, sure."

Spencer cocked his head to one side. Something about that didn't make sense. He looked at his father's facial expression and body language, he could tell his Dad was hiding something. What was it?

"Dad, what is it you want me to remember?"

"It doesn't matter. You'll remember when it's time."

"What don't you tell me right now?"

"You know Spence, when you were young we went to a lot of doctors. I was worried your extraordinary mind meant you might end up like your mother. They told me sometimes, you would not hold onto details, especially if the memories were traumatic. They also said you would remember eventually. They said it's better if I let you remember it on your own. Like you did with Riley Jenkins. So, you'll remember when it's time."

"I don't want you here. Go away."

"Not today. This is what I'm here for. Why don't you tell me what Emily thinks I'm going to help you with. It must be something pretty bad."

Spencer sighed. Maybe if he got this over with his dad would go away. "I wondered if you ever regretted leaving us."

William nodded. "Many times."

"Then why didn't you come back."

"It wasn't that simple."

"Yes it was."

"No, Spencer, it wasn't. Someday, you'll understand."

"I'm not a kid. Tell me now. Was it me? Was a that terrible a burden you had to leave?"

"I told you, I lost my confidence."

"That's crap. I've thought about that answer, and it's total crap. I would never leave my girls, not for anything."

"You're wrong. You would."

"No. I wouldn't. There is nothing that would make me leave them, Dad. I love them too much. Is that it? Did you just not love me?"

William sighed. "Spencer, has Emily ever made you promise something? The kind of promise you can't break?"

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"It's everything. Keeping promises to the mother of your children is everything. I did. I kept my promises to your mother."

"You left."

"Yet the bills were always paid. You two were never evicted. Did you think that was an accident? The lawyer that came every so often, who do you think paid them. Who do you think they reported to? I always knew what was going on. I made sure you two were taken care of. If you remembered that night... What good is that mind of yours if you can't even remember the night I broke the promise to myself and told you everything?"

Spencer looked at him is disbelief. Told him what? What was his father talking about?

"Maybe you're right Spence. Maybe I should go. I'll talk to you later." William stood up and walked away.

"Go ahead, Dad. Leaving is what you're good at."

But William Reid didn't hear what his son said. He was too lost in his own thoughts. This was the hospital the girls were born in. The maternity ward was just a few floors up. The girls had been delivered, but Emily was in distress, some kind of post-op infection. Spencer broke down and cried.

It took both William and Elizabeth Prentiss to calm Spencer down. William asked if Spencer could see the girls. When they were allowed to, William took Spencer to infant room. They saw the girls from the other side the large glass window.

"What do I do" Spencer asked," if she dies? How can I be a father?" He turned around and he looked at his father, his eyes full of tears and fear.

"You can do this Spencer. You are the perfect person to do it."

"How? Dad, I don't know what to do."

"Yes you do. You've read every book you could being a parent, I know you did."

"It's not enough, Dad. It's not enough to be smart. I can't take care of them."

"Yes you can."

"What if I leave them? Like you did."

"You won't."

"How do you know?"

"I know."

"You don't. You don't anything about me, Dad. Not really. You don't know." Tears kept rolling down his face.

William turned his son around so he faced his daughters. "Look at those faces Spencer. You'll never leave them. You will love them forever. You will do whatever you need to do to take care of them. Trust me."

"You didn't."

"Actually, I did. I took care of you and kept my promise to your mother."

"What promise?"

"The day you were born, she made me promise never to take you away from her or make go to a hospital unless she was ready to go. On that day, I would have promised her anything."

Spencer turned around and looked at his father. "Dad, did Mom tell you to leave?"

"Don't worry about that now."

"But Dad, "Spencer began.

"Spencer, you're about to learn when you're a father, you put everyone's need above yours. You will do that. You've done that your whole life. Look at your daughters. Say hi to them and let them know you will love them. When you're done, we'll talk."

Except, when Spencer was done, they had news about Emily. They never had that talk. And soon, it was as if the revelation never happened.


	16. Round 2

_Present Day_

_Spencer Reid's Hospital Room_

As Spencer Reid lay in his hospital bed, he kept imagining he was in his bed at home with Emily by his side. He loved the way she would nestle her head in the crook of his neck. He was imagining this scene when his father's voice echoed in his head.

"Don't promise her anything."

Spencer looked around. He was still alone in the room, his father was nowhere to be seen. He thought about those words. They were familiar to him. He head his father say those exact words to him before. When was it?

It wasn't like he had too many talks with his father as an adult. The wedding? No, that wasn't it. When was it?

But he knew when it was. It was the night the girls were born. It was the night he thought he lost Emily.

Five times. Five times the doctors updated him before everything was all right. Five times he thought they had good news, only to find out they had worse news. Each time, his heart was in his throat. Each time, his father and Emily's mother held his hands. The three of them held a bond that night.

The sixth time, however, the doctor told him she was awake. She was fine, and she was asking for him. As he stood up to go see her his father said, "Spencer whatever you do don't make her any promises."

Spencer was pondering this when his father came back in the room and sat down in the chair. Neither one of them spoke for a few minutes.

"You came back," Spencer said.

"Yeah. I'm ready for round two."

"Round two?"

"Did you think I didn't know what was going to happen today. So, go ahead. Tell me exactly what's on your mind."

There was a fierceness in William Reid's eyes. Spencer recognized it. I was the same look his father had the day he left. The look he had when Spencer accused him of being a pedophile and a murderer years before. None of that anger was there the night the girls were born.

"I remembered something about the night the girls were born. When Emily was okay, when she regained consciousness and was asking for me, you said something to me. You told me not to make any promises to her. What did you mean by that?"

William Reid sighed. It was time. It was finally time to tell Spencer everything, and doing it scared him.

"Sometimes, guys make promises they shouldn't. I didn't want you to do something you might regret. You were so worried about her, that you almost lost her. You would have promised her anything, I think, if she asked it."

"But we talked about it earlier that night, didn't we?"

"Yes, we did." His Dad's voice was soft and thick with emotion.

"Dad, did you make a promise to Mom? One that you regret?"

"Two."

"Did you keep them?"

"Yes."

"But you left."

"Staying wasn't one of them. I couldn't stay and keep them."

"I don't understand. What promises did you make?"

"I promised I would never take you from her."

"I don't understand Dad, why would she…"

"She was scared the whole time she was pregnant with you. She was off her meds, and it was a very scary time for her. She was scared of everything. As soon as she held you in her arms, she fell in love with you. She was afraid …Anyway, she made me promise I would never you away from he and that I would never put her in a hospital against her will."

"Dad, is that why you left? I mean I remember you and Mom arguing about her health a lot before you left. Were you trying to convince her to go to the hospital?"

"Yes."

"Don't you think that would have been a good promise to break?"

"Maybe. I've thought about for about 20 years now, and I don't know the answer to that question. I know I couldn't bring myself to break either promise. It's worked out okay."

"Dad, how can you say that?"

"Spencer, you've dedicated your life to helping people. You're a loving husband and father. That's all I've wanted for you. I can't be certain things would be better if I hadn't left. I can't be sure how things would have turned out if I broke my promises."

"I've spent most of my life hating you."

"I know. And I've spent a certain part of my life being mad about it. But I knew that's what would happen. It's alright. You knew your mother loved you, and I didn't want you to feel like you had to choose between us. Anyway, what's is done is done."

"She told me, you know. Mom told me she made you leave. She told me that all the time. I never believed her."

"I know. She told me."

"When?"

"Do you remember some letter's she used to get, in a special envelope? Cream colored with a gold seal?"

"She wouldn't let me touch them. They were from you?"

"Yeah. We wrote back and forth. Sometimes I went years without her writing to me, but I always knew what was happening. Anyway, I visited a few times after you started at the FBI."

"I never knew."

"I guess we got in the habit of keeping it a secret. It never seemed like a good time to reveal it. So, now you know everything."

"Not quite. How did you get Mom here? Dr. Norman wouldn't let leave for indefinite amount of time. You would have had to give him a time frame, unless…. Dad, did you ..Is Mom discharged from Bennington?"

"Yes."

"Dad! What are you thinking?"

"She has an entrance interview at a hospital here. Dr. Norman provided the referral."

"Dad?"

"She doesn't want to live on the other side of the country from her family anymore."

"I never thought about doing that. I could have. I could have moved her closer to us. Why didn't I?"

"Don't worry about it. Like I said, you can undo the past. Bennington has been good for her. Now it's time for a something else."

"Dad, are you moving too?"

"Not yet. I have some things to wrap back home. But I'm hoping to move out here. I have some things to figure out first. Anyway, getting your Mom settled out here first is more important. And you. I didn't think you'd figure it out."

"Didn't anyone tell you? I'm a genius."

William Reid smiled. "Yes you are. But remember, you're a husband and father first."

It was, Spencer thought, the smartest and nicest thing his father had ever said to him.


	17. More From Nana and Mommy

_Present Day_

_Reid-Prentiss Household_

At the same time that Spencer and William were having their father/son talk, Diana was having her phone session with Dr. Norman and Emily was reading the letters William had written.

_Dear Diana,_

_I haven't heard from you for several weeks. I know that means you're having a bad spell. I have thought about coming to see you. It is one of my persistent thoughts. I regret having left. I regret more keeping my promises, but it is not in me to break them, not even now._

_I appreciate the picture you sent me of Spencer. I would have rather he didn't get fast tracked into high school._

_The world will get to have his intellectual talents soon enough, but I would like him to enjoy his childhood. I know you want him to develop his mind, but believe me when I tell you that his greatness contribution to the world isn't going to be from his mind. I know the greatest contribution he will make in the world will come from the content of his heart. That's why I wished you would have let him take his time through high school._

_Despite of that, though, I am proud of him. I want you to remember that I love both of you, and all you have to do is tell me to come home, and I will come. But you know you need to more care than either Spencer and I can give you. You need the care of doctors._

_I hope you can make the right choice, if not for your sake, then for Spencer's._

_Love always,_

_William_

"So, what do you think?" Diana asked.

Emily looked up. She had been so absorbed from reading the letters that she hadn't noticed Diana had finished her phone session with Dr. Norman and was now sitting across the table from her.

"You two wrote letters to each other? You never told Spencer his where his father was?"

"What would you have done?"

Emily let out a huge sigh. She had been thinking about that the entire time she had been reading. "Why are you sharing this with me now? And why were you asking about when the girls were born?"

"Will told Spencer everything that night, but he's forgotten it. I know he has. I want to tell him again, but Will thinks it's too much to tell him."

"That's impossible. If he had told Spencer any of this there is no way Spencer would have forgotten. There is just no way."

"Emily, you and I both know how Spencer's mind works. We are probably two of the few people in the world who know his memory isn't perfect. We know when it's an emotional memory, especially a painful one, he doesn't hold it perfectly. In fact, sometimes he doesn't remember it all."

Emily knew she was right. She remembered telling Spencer once," Yes, I know you have an eidetic memory and an IQ of 187, but what do you remember of your father? He gave you 10 years before he left."

"And" Emily said, "that night was tough for him. Once they put me under, I didn't know what was happening. Spencer though…All right, so he might not remember, but why now? Why is it important for him to remember? And why did you need to come?"

"I wasn't going to miss seeing my grandson born, not like I missed the girls being born."

Emily looked at Diana, and then some mental tumblers clicked into place. "Diana, how did you get Dr. Norman to let you leave for a prolonged period of time? Or is this only temporary? "

Diana didn't respond.

"Diana," Emily said," did you get yourself discharged?"

"It took William weeks to arrange it. I did move the time table up when you called, but it was already in the works."

"But you were committed!"

"And I will be in a hospital here. It's the appointment I have. Why should I be on the other side of the country from my family?"

"And when did you and William get remarried?"

Diana blinked her eyes in surprised. "What do you mean?"

"William didn't arrange any of this with you you two getting remarried. There is no way."

"We never got divorced. We always stayed married to each other. After Spencer joined the FBI, William would visit every so often. After Spencer came asking about Riley Jenkins, he came more often. That's when he started writing me about you."

Emily blushed. She couldn't help it, whenever she thought about what Spencer might tell his mother about her, she just blushed.

"You have been so good for him," her mother-in-law said.

"It's going to be hard to tell him about all of this Diana, you know that."

She nodded in agreement. "But it's time. It's past time he knew. "

"Let me tell him."

"I should tell him."

Emily shook her head. "No Diana. I'm the one who helps with difficult truths now. I'm going to tell him, I'm going to hold his hand, and when he's calm you two can talk to him."

"Unless William already told him."

"Then I get to hold his hand and calm him down after the fact." Emily went into the kitchen and picked up the phone and called Spencer's room.

"Hello?" It was Spencer.

"It's me. I think we need to talk. I've been having a talk with your Mom, and I think there's some things you need to know."

"Is it about the night the girls were born?"

"Among other things."

"Like what?"

"Some letters and about your Dad leaving."

"I know already. He's been telling me."

"Did he tell you about Bennington?"

"Yeah."

"Are you okay?"

"I'm going to see if I can come home today."

"Do you want me to come get you?"

"No, Dad will give me a ride. I just want you to rest. I miss you."

"Ditto. Are you okay?"

"Except for being shot, yeah I'm fine. How do you feel?"

"Me?"

"I didn't know how you would feel about Mom being so close."

"I'm fine with Spencer. If nothing else it will make things easier to arrange a visit for the girls. Is your Dad moving?"

"He will."

"How do you feel about that?"

"I don't know yet. We'll see."

"Let me know if you're coming home today."

"I will."

"I love you."

"I love you more."

"We'll argue about that later."


	18. It's Time

_Present Day_

_The Hospital_

But Spencer wasn't allowed home that day. Nor, did it seem, were they going to let him go home the next day either. William tried to convince the doctor his son would be fine, as did Spencer, but to no avail. So it was on the afternoon following the great revelations of William and Diana that Emily went to the hospital with the intent of brow-beating the doctors into letting her husband come home. She was yelling at the doctors, threatening to bring in swat teams, and shutting down the hospital.

"Take a deep breath, Em." Spencer said. He had heard the commotion from his room, and realized it could only be his wife. He wasn't so much worried about the hospital staff as his wife's blood pressure.

"Don't take that tone with me Spencer. I want to know why they're intent on holding you hostage."

Spencer put his hand on her shoulder and said," Why don't we go to my room and sit for a few minutes. You look like you need to sit down."

"Don't do that. Don't you dare do that." Her voice reaching a dangerous tone."

"It'll be okay. You can come back and threaten the hospital staff when we're done." He gently turned her around and steered her to his room. She accused him of being a condescending SOB and worse the whole time. He took it all in stride, simply nodding and saying "Yes Dear" as he guided her into his room and into the chair near his bed.

He sat on his bed and looked at her. She was still glaring at him. "Don't think I will forget this, Spencer Reid. This is …is…."

"Kinda hard to maintain the anger, isn't it?" he said with a grin on his face.

She sighed and glared at him some more. "I hate you right now."

"It's all right. Because I love you." He held her hand. "Just relax Emily. Everything's fine. There is nothing you need to do or take care of. Just relax and rest."

Her eyes softened, as she leaned back into the chair. "I just want to get this over with."

"Matthew?"

"The bed rest, the waiting. I want you home. Just once, I'd like us to be close to normal."

"Me too. But then again, that wouldn't be us."

"JJ got to work until Henry was born."

"JJ was much younger than you are now."

"Really? You're going to bring that up to me right now?"

"Sorry. It's okay, just relax. Everything's fine." He leaned over, kissed her on the lips. It started out as a gentle and tender kiss, then it turned into a more passionate kiss. When it ended, Emily looked at her husband, clearly surprised by the passion in his kiss.

"Wow. Where did that come from?"

"I can't help it. You bring that out of me."

"I look like a whale right now."

"You look good to me. You have always looked good to me and you always will."

"That's so nice." She said. Then she winced.

"Are you okay? Is he kicking?"

"No, that feels different. I'll be fine. It'll go away in a moment."

"Has this happened before?"

"This morning. Then a few hours ago." She let out a breath. "There, see, I'm fine."

"Emily, I think you're going into labor."

"No, that's impossible. He's not due for a few weeks."

"Isn't that how it happened with JJ and Henry? A few weeks early? And it's not like you went through a normal labor with the girls, remember?" Spencer pushed the nurse's button on his bed's console.

"What are you doing, Spencer?"

"I think we need someone to take a look at you is all."

One of the nurses came in. "Are you all right, Mr. Reid?" she asked.

"I'm fine, but I think my wife might be going into labor."

"No, I'm not. My husband is mistaken." Emily said. But a few minutes later, she found herself in the maternity ward, with doctors all around.

Spencer, on the other hand, made three calls. One to his Dad, one to JJ and one to his mother-in-law. He told all three of them that Emily was going into labor. He didn't know how long it was going to be, but he expected it wouldn't be long before his son was born.

Before long, the waiting room was filled with the BAU team, Reid's parents, Elizabeth Prentiss, and two curious girls who were waiting for their brother to be born.

"How much longer Daddy?" Samantha asked.

"I don't know. We'll have to see."

"Did we take this long, Daddy?" Diane asked.

"It was a little different."

"Why?"

Spencer heard both his father and his mother-in-law involuntarily gasp. He met their gazes, and made a decision.

"Actually girls, it was very different. You see, things didn't go well when you two were born. You know how Mommy's been feeling your brother kick inside her?"

They nodded.

"Well, you two did too. Except, that day, she didn't feel you kick. So we got worried and came to the hospital. The doctors said you two were fine, but we decided you two needed to come into the world. So, there was no waiting like there is now. Something else happened too."

"What?" they asked.

"Your mother …well she wasn't doing too well either. She suddenly got very sick, and we were all afraid she might die."

"But she didn't." Samantha said.

"No. She didn't. But I thought she was going to. I was so afraid we were going to lose her. I still get nightmares about it, if you want to know the truth."

"Is that going to happen this time Daddy? Is Mommy going to almost die?" Diane asked.

"No. But that's why she's been taking it easy this time around. This is why we've been so careful. Ever since we knew your brother was on the way, we made sure we took very good care of Mommy. Of course, the whole time Mommy's been taking even better care of us, wasn't she?"

"Dr. Reid?" it was one of the nurses. She's asking for you. It's time."

"I'll be right there," he said. He looked at his daughters and hugged them. "I love you very much. Now, I'm going to go in there and help Mommy. You two behave for every one here."

They both promised, and kissed him.

After he went away with the nurses, Hotch looked at Rossi. "Did you know about any of that?" he asked.

"Not a clue."

Samantha must have heard them whisper to each other, because she walked up to them. "Do you two know how it happened?"

The two men looked at each other. "How what happened, sweetie?" Rossi asked.

She sighed. "How Mommy and Daddy fell in love, of course. Because that's how come they had us."

"You know, sweetie, I don't think I know the whole story."

"Then sit down, Uncle Dave. Because I have to tell it to you. "

Everyone sat down, and Samantha began, "It all started when Mommy joined the team. She and Daddy went on an adventure to stop very bad people from doing bad things. They don't know it, but that's when they fell in love."

"Well, if they don't know it, how do you?" Rossi asked.

"Because," Diane said, "we figured it out when they started telling us the story. But you've got listen to the whole story to understand."

And the two girls began to tell everyone the whole story. Or at least, the parts the girls knew.


	19. The Beginning

_Present Day_

_The Delivery Room_

"This is all your fault!" Emily said. "You did this to me you bastard!"

They were in the delivery room, Spencer, Emily, and the doctors. The contractions were getting closer, and Emily hit that moment of transition when many women start hurling insults at their husbands.

What the doctors weren't ready for was Spencer's reaction.

"Is that the best you can do?"

"Excuse me?" her voice went up several octaves.

"I mean, you said worse to me when you thought I was flirting with that bartender, what was her name?"

"Do you think this is a game?"

"No, but I know you've been waiting for a chance to yell. Earlier you wanted to be mad, so go ahead. You've never had a problem with it before."

"You just wait until we're done here, I will kick your ass."

"If you say so."

"Asshole."

"I love you too dear."

Emily couldn't help it, she just started laughing. It was a rich, melodious sound, the laughter that Reid loved hearing. He just loved hearing her laugh, there were times before they started dating when his entire goal was to make her laugh. It wasn't hard some days, like she was just waiting for someone to give her an excuse to laugh.

As her peals of laughter died away, she looked him in the eyes. "It isn't going to be like last time, is it?"

"No," he said.

"It feels a lot like how it began, doesn't it?"

"Yeah."

_About 10 months ago_

_A Hotel room in Lansing, Michigan_

They were getting rest. The day had been spent looking at crime scenes, crime scene photos, interviewing witnesses, victims families, and working on the profile. They gave the police the profile, and now it was time to rest.

For Reid and Emily, that meant calling Emily's mother and talking to the girls. They told the girls they loved them, they missed them, and they would be home as soon as they could. They would soon have a new adventure to tell them about, and then the girls were going to bed. When the call was over, Reid took a shower. He used that time to put the case out of his mind. There was a time, before the girls, before dating Emily, that he would use this time to go over the case in his head when he showered. He had learned, however, that wasn't helpful. When he shared a room with Emily, he learned it was better to focus on her. When he got out of the shower, he saw she was sitting on the bed, her head and shoulders hunched over. Spencer could feel the tension in her from the bathroom. She had been like this for a few weeks. Every time he asked her what was wrong, she would say, "Nothing." He hadn't pressed the issue. Now, however ….

"What's wrong honey," he asked.

"It's nothing. I'm fine."

"No, you're not." He sat down next to her. "What's wrong?"

"It's just the case. No big deal."

"It's not the case. You've been like this for weeks. Just tell me."

"Leave it along, Spencer."

"No."

"Excuse me?" She was talking in her warning tone. That tone had made him back down at home. Tonight, however, he would not back down.

"You've been like this for weeks, and I've let you be. Not tonight though. You wouldn't let me get away with this."

"With what?"

"Shoving whatever it is down below the surface. The problem is we both do this when something's bothering us. I haven't been doing my part to see what the problem is."

"Don't try to fix me," Emily growled.

"I wasn't going to," Spencer said," I just want to listen."

"To what?"

"Whatever you need to talk about."

"I don't need to talk about anything."

"Sure you do."

"Don't you start with me Spencer Reid," Emily said. "Just leave me alone."

"No."

"Why the hell not?"

"Because that's not part of my vow to cherish and honor you Emily. It's certainly not loving not to share whatever burden is weighing on you."

"It is nothing. Nothing is …" She tried to make more words come out, but instead she started crying, and she just held onto him so tightly he was afraid she might break him. He held onto her and said," That's it, let it out. I've got you."

They sat like that for a while. Her sobs stopped and she let go of him. "I feel like an idiot." She said.

"Why?"

"I've been feeling like this for a couple weeks and I don't know why."

"Yes you do. Somewhere in here," he tapped her forehead with his pointer finger," You know. When it's time to know, you'll know. Until then, I'm happy to hold onto to you and listen to whatever comes out."

"I'm so glad I married you," she said. They stayed like for a while, then Emily got up and showered. It was sometime later that they were sleeping. Except that Emily was having a nightmare. It was one she kept having. She was in the hospital, right after giving birth to the girls, and she saw herself bleed to death.

She woke up hearing Spencer whisper in her ear," It's okay. I've got you. Nothing will hurt you." As she opened her eyes, she realized he was holding her.

"I'm sorry, did I wake you?"

"No, I never went to sleep."

"Why not?"

"I figured you must be having nightmares. Since we both know I sleep like the dead, I figured it might be a good idea to stay awake and be ready when you had one."

"You couldn't know I'd have one."

"And yet I did."

Emily lightly punched him in the stomach.

"What was that for?" he asked.

"For not sleeping when you should be. You're going to be like the walking dead tomorrow."

"I've survived on no sleep and lots of coffee long before I met you, I'll be fine. And this isn't about me. This is about you. What were dreaming about?"

She hesitated. "I died. I bled to death the night the girls were born."

"That almost happened. You kept bleeding."

"I know. I've been having that nightmare or ones like it."

"About that night?"

"Sometimes we're on a case and I die."

"Did you ever have nightmares like that before?"

"Sometimes. But it never bothered me before. Not like this."

"You know why," he said."

"Tell me, _Doctor_ Reid." Her tone indicated she wasn't in the mood to have her dreams and emotions explained to her.

Not that her tone scared Spencer off doing exactly that. "It's because of the girls. Maybe me too, but mostly the girls. You're afraid of what would happen if you weren't here anymore."

She got very quiet, knowing he was right. "If that happens, Spencer …"

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"You were going say if you die, I should find someone else, right?"

"You should be happy, Spencer."

"I will be. If you die, there is no one else. You are the only woman I've loved. The only one I will ever love. You are the only woman who will be mother to my children, and the only woman who will share my bed. That's it."

He was about to say something else, but Emily interrupted him by kissing him.  
When the kiss ended, she said, " Words are totally inadequate in this situation. I'll show you what is, though."

What happened next was the kissing of lips, of bodies touching and being entangled. They made love with a passion they hadn't in months. A few months later, when they found out Emily was pregnant again, they knew that was the night when it happened.


	20. Never Ending

_Present Day_

_Hospital Waiting Room_

While Emily and Spencer were in the delivery room, the girls were regaling they grown up with how Mommy and Daddy fell in love.

"They loved each other from the beginning," Samantha said," but they didn't know it. So they just caught monsters together. Then there was the time they fought Henkel monster."

"Samantha!" Diane barked at her sister. Everyone was shocked at the force of Diane's voice. The glare she leveled at her sister was almost frightening. Samantha understood the communication in the glare: _Don't tell that story. It's private. And don't you dare talk about where Daddy goes on Thursday nights._

While neither one of the girls understood exactly what the Beltway Clean Cops meetings were about, they knew it was a place Daddy had to go Thursday nights, and it had to do with what the Henkel-monster did to him.

"But the important thing," Diane said is a gentler tone, "is what happened when Aunt JJ was getting ready to have Henry."

"What?" JJ was taken a little by surprise by that.

Samantha nodded. "That's when Mommy and Daddy talked to each other about wanting to be a mommy and daddy. They knew they wanted to be a mommy and daddy, they didn't know they wanted to be mommy and daddy together. But of course they did."

"How do you know that?" Rossi asked.

"You know, we don't interrupt when you tell stories, Uncle Dave," Samantha said.

Everyone laughed at that.

"Then," Diane said," they went to Vegas, where Grandpa and Nana live. But Daddy didn't know Grandpa lived there. He hadn't see Grandpa in a long time."

There was a brief awkward silence.

"But then daddy found him. He wasn't looking for him though. Not at first. He only found him because he had to find a special monster. He remembered a boy had died long ago, a friend of his."

"He wasn't a friend, Sam" Diane said. "He was someone Daddy knew. Daddy forgot Riley died. He forgot all about Riley."

"Spencer forgot something?" Elizabeth Prentiss was shocked. In the time she knew her son-in-law, he had never forgotten anything.

"Sometimes he forgets things," Diane said. "especially when it's sad. He can't remember almost anything about the night Sam and I were born, because Mommy almost died. Anyway, when he remembered Riley was killed, he wouldn't stop until he found the man who killed him. Except the man was already dead. But by then he found Grandpa."

"Then Aunt JJ had Henry, and Daddy talked to Mommy." Samantha said. "And Mommy told him she loved him, but he didn't believe her. So she was mad at him for a long time."

"Then her friend died." Diane said. "She was so sad. It was a priest-monster that did it, and everyone helped catch him. But Mommy was still sad, but Daddy was there. He told her he loved her."

"And that's," Samantha said, " is when they _finally_ realized they loved each other." She looked at Hotch. "And then…" she paused. She wasn't certain how to tell the next part.

Diane walked over to Hotch and climbed up on his lap. "Uncle Aaron," she said, "the next part's a little hard. It's about Haley." She touched his hand. "Do you know what happened after the Foyet-monster killed her?"

Hotch smiled gently at her. "That's when your parents decided to get married. It's okay. We all know this part of the story."

"Then they got married and had us," Samantha said.

It was some time later, that Spencer came in the waiting room and told everyone that Emily had given birth to Matthew Jason Prentiss-Reid.

_Present Day_

_Emily's hospital room_

Emily was sleeping in her hospital bed, and Spencer was sitting in the chair with little Matthew in his arms. Spencer looked at his son, he remembered when the girls were this small. Matthew looked just as adorable as the girls did. He felt the same feelings of love and wanting to protect Matthew that he felt for the girls.

"I've got a lot of things I need to tell you," Spencer said softly, "and I know I'll need to tell them to you over and over again, but I don't see any reason to wait. The first thing you need to know is that your mother and I love you very much. I also want to tell you that I will never abandon you, your mother or your sisters. I will have to be gone from time to time, but that's not the same."

Matthew seemed unimpressed from what his father had just told him, but Spencer kept on talking.

"I won't keep secrets from you. I may not tell you everything at once, but I promise not to keep secrets. I love your Nana and Grandpa Reid, but they kept secrets from me they shouldn't have. I forgive them, because that's what you do for people you love. It doesn't mean what they did was right, just that I'm choosing not to hold it against them."

Spencer paused to see if there was any recognition on Matthew's part. He knew there wouldn't be, but he also knew he was saying things mostly for his own benefit, not for Matthew's.

"I also need you to know, there's a possibility that I might become deranged later on. It hasn't happened yet, so as time goes on, it becomes less and less likely. But that doesn't mean that it won't happen. If it does, I'm going to need to be committed. It's okay. I'm okay with that. One more thing. I'm going to make promises to you. Probably a lot of them. I just want to know, I may need to break them. See, some promises need to be broken. If your grandfather had been able to do that…things would have been a lot different. That might be the most important thing for you to remember."

"Do you really think he's going to remember any of that, Spencer?" Emily said.

Spencer looked up and saw Emily looking at him. "I thought you were asleep."

"I was for a bit. Now I'm awake."

"How much did you hear?"

"Most of it, I think. You really are bothered by what your parents did, aren't you? Did you talk to them about it?"

"No."

"Spencer," she said in an annoyed tone.

"What is there to talk about? They did it, and it was wrong. No matter how much we talk about it, we can't change that it happened. Anymore than we change about me not believing you when you first said you loved me or change anything else that happened in the past."

"So what are you going to do?"

"What I've already done. I forgave them, and I'll make sure we never repeat their mistake. I just need you to one thing for me."

"What?"

"If I start being like Mom. If I .."

"You are well past the age of on-set Spencer."

"I know. But that doesn't mean it won't happen. If it does, you have to commit me."

"Spencer…"

"I mean it Em. Commit me. Visit as often as you can, but you have to commit me."

"I promise. Now are you done laying down the law?"

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…"

"Yes you did, and it's fine. Can I hold Matthew, or are you intent on holding onto him for the rest of your life?"

Spencer managed to look sheepish. He stood up and put Matthew in Emily's arms. Emily smiled at her son, and it seemed to Reid that her smiled lit up the room. "Hey you, " she said to little Matthew.

"We'll talk about a lot things later on, but there's one thing I will never say often enough. I love you and I love your father. And you know what? Your father loves you too. And your sisters. The only thing I regret, is that I didn't realize I loved your father sooner. Someday, I'll tell you the whole story. But for now, I love you, and she kissed Matthew on his forehead.

It was some time later that the girls were in the room with them. They cooed over their brother. Samantha leaned down and said," Just wait, I'll tell all about how Mommy and Daddy fell in love," she said.

"So you think you know the whole story now?" Spencer said.

"Of course we do Daddy," she said very matter-of-factly.

"You don't sweetie.," he said. "Not all of it. Because it didn't start with us. It started with your Nana and Grandpa Reid, and with your Grandpa and Nana Prentiss. Then it continued with me and Mommy. And all you know are a few highlights, but even if you knew all those other parts you still wouldn't know the whole story. We write new chapters in our love story everyday. And when we're gone, it still won't be over. It will continue with you and Diane and Matthew. It will never end."

Samantha pondered this. Every so often in the next months ( and years) she would ask for more and more parts of the story. When she was a teenager, she filled a whole journal with the stories. When she was older, and had children of her own, she would read them the story. They would always ask why she kept telling them the story. She always said," because this is the story worth telling. Love stories always are."


End file.
